TODAY'S HEADLINES

Today's headlines include news on the Pirates' struggles, Joe Starkey's Aki Iwamura Song,  Big Ben's psychological evaluation, Sidney Crosby's rich new Reebok deal, Ron Cook on the future of John Russell, and more...

GOTTA LOVE OLD PROGRAMS, PART III

It's time for another very brief installment of one of my favorite ongoing features where I pull the greatest photos and ads from old Pirate, Steeler, and Penguin programs. The program du jour we're breaking down is actually a 1993 Steelers yearbook, and it's got two real highlights. The first is this group photo of the PG sportswriters, featuring a heavily bearded Ron Cook, Bob Smizik almost smiling, and a bunch of other guys wearing really big glasses, which must have been cool in 1993. By the way, you can click on these photos to enjoy them in their expanded glory - this would make a great poster for any Pittsburgh-themed rec room or bar.

Second, we have WPXI's John Fedko dangerously balancing on a pile of every ball known to man to illustrate just how on the ball his reporting really is. While this pales in comparison to his tuxedo-wearing ad in an '89 Pens program, any vintage Fedko memorabilia is good Fedko memorabilia in my book.

Others from the series:

HIGHWAY SAFETY WITH THE '92 PENS

OLD PROGRAMS ARE FUN (1989 Pens)

Email: Mondesishouse@gmail.com Twitter: twitter.com/mondesishouse Facebook: Facebook Group

HIGHWAY SAFETY WITH THE '92 PENS

I'm a nostalgic nerd, and nostalgic nerds occasionally take trips down memory lane when a room in the house needs cleaned out. This was last done sometime in November, when I unearthed a 1989 Penguins program that held gems like this inside:

This time, another room, another box of miscellaneous stuff. And today's treasure is something I pray will be re-made in the near future...the 1992 Pittsburgh Penguins Highway Safety activity book, a joint venture between the team and the Allegheny County Health Department.

As the title implies, highway safety = Stanley Cups. It's a proven formula. Take this year, for instance. Did you hear of any Penguins being unsafe behind the wheel? And what happened a few months later, you ask? I think the picture illustrates my point. The secret is out: much like Craig Patrick did years ago, Ray Shero targets good drivers when putting together a roster.

Now it's time for some messages from individual players. Let's start with a well-known choir boy, Kevin "Artie" Stevens:

We could go a million different directions there, but I'll let you produce your own one-liners on that one.

We move next to Ron Francis, who delivers an important message on safety belts. Because if people in this country have a common problem, it's not putting on a safety belt in the right fashion. I usually get tangled in mine with little to no effort. But I'm curious, are seat belts an area of expertise for Francis? And what are the odds the Allegheny County Health Department really sat down him for this quote? Finally, it's Ulf Samuelsson, showing you equal ways to get plastered when choosing different types of booze. That's right, only five ounces of wine gives you the same effect as 12 ounces of beer! And to back him up, Jim Paek reminds us that, contrary to what you've heard, some people don't drink alcohol. And yes, that is an actual quote from Jim Paek.

I know, I know, their hearts were in the right place. They didn't produce this book years ago with the intention that some wise-acre was going to dissect it with his fellow wise-acre buddies years later. But that's the charm of our latest treasure of the basement. And like I said, about that sequel...how's this for a cover shot?
Email: Mondesishouse@gmail.com Twitter: twitter.com/mondesishouse Facebook: Facebook Group

OLD PROGRAMS ARE FUN

While cleaning through a stack of random junk the other day, I uncovered a program from a 1989 Penguins game. And let me tell you, I was pleasantly surprised, from a comedic point of view. Some of the ads were simply priceless. It was like going through an old high school yearbook. I've scanned some of the highlights for your approval (click on the image for a larger view).

1. John Fedko, for WPXI:

Yowza. Consider this a gold mine for the Fedko "fans" out there, if they hadn't stumbled onto it already. I believe the timing of this ad would place him in his third year at the station (hard to believe it's been 21 years already); but when you consider the 'stache, the formal wear, the youthful exuberance...this just wins on a number of levels.

2. Tom Barrasso, for WTAE:

I must admit: I did not listen to sports talk radio when I was 12. I was more interested in wiffle ball and Ninja Gaiden at the time. But my oh my, look at that murderer's row lineup that 'TAE was sporting: Bill Hillgrove, Stan Savran, Myron Cope, Guy Junker, AND Alby Oxenreiter. May I nominate this as the deepest Pittsburgh sports department ever?

3. KDKA:

Going for simplicity, KDKA uses a simple graphic of what is now a very old TV featuring an image of the greatest hockey player ever. Sometimes, less is more.

4. I.C Light:

From the memorable "Preserve the Wild Life" campaign comes this vintage I.C. Light ad. How many of you took your mullets to Donzi's and ordered a few of these after a raucous night at the arena 20 years ago?

5. WPGH Fox 53:

OK, they were 32-40-8, so I guess 1989-90 wasn't the year after all. At least they were optimistic. And don't forget, at this point in time, channel 53's lineup was counting more on syndicated episodes of Mama's Family than the fledgling network sitcoms that would blossom into The Simpsons and Married...with Children.

6. Paul Coffey for Colussy Chevrolet:

I remember few businesses (outside of Wendy's and their glorious free chili promotion) that loved the Pens more than Colussy Chevrolet. And what better to illustrate this partnership than a 28-year-old Paul Coffey leaning on a beautiful, maroon Chevy truck?

So what's the moral of the story? Well, I don't know if there's a moral out of 20-year-old sight gags featuring John Fedko in a tuxedo and goalie pads, but there's usually a treasure or two to be had when cleaning out a basement. This is not the last you will see out of this series, I promise you.

Send your news, tips, and links to Mondesishouse@gmail.com.

JOSE BAUTISTA A BLUE JAY

Earlier this afternoon, the Pirates consummated a trade with the Toronto Blue Jays that sent 3B Jose Bautista north of the border for the always-intriguing Minor Leaguer To Be Named Later.

Rather than bore you with statistics, I'll limit my coverage to an email that our very own A.J. sent me a few hours after the deal that pretty much summarizes what it's like to be a baseball fan in Pittsburgh in August:

"So... let me explain the situation. I just got home from work a while ago and am relaxing on the couch as I type this on my laptop. I just watched the sports segment with Fedko on the Channel 11 News.

Lead off story... Steelers/Farrior contract, followed by Tomlin talking about Saturday, cutaway to Rich Walsh at Steelers HQ talking about the defense and Polamalu. Then a mention on Gene Upshaw passing with subsequent interview with Charlie Batch (Steelers NFLPA rep). Next... a season preview of Baldwin High School's football team complete with shots of practice and an interview with one of the greatest yinzer coaches in the WPIAL (he actually tagged a sentence with the term "and stuff n'at"... that's like a double n'at... awesome)

Then...as the sports segment is wrapping up... almost as an afterthought... Fedko throws in (almost speed reading to end the segment before they go to commercial).. and the Pirates trade Jose Bautista to Toronto for a player to be named later.

Gotta love Pittsburgh baseball come August... a somewhat significant personnel move is almost forgotten, tucked away in a newscast behind a mention of a dead Oakland Raider and pre season high school football. Awesome.

I truly forget what it feels like to even give the slightest of s**ts about baseball at this time of year. I bet it must be nice... but I can't recall."

Well said, A.J. But did you hear we signed Pedro Alvarez?

QUITE A HOLE WE'VE EXCAVATED

DETROIT 3

PENGUINS 0

No, not even the much-ballyhooed presence of Luke Ravenstahl could inspire the Pens in Detroit

You've overachieved by everyone's standards all year long. Your team is down two games to none, failing to muster even one goal in Detroit Rock City. What time is it? Time for everyone's favorite pastime, The Blame Game!

Michel Therrien is blaming the refs. Gene Collier is calling out Gary Roberts for a "chicken-scat cheap shot" on Johan Franzen. John Fedko was pointing the finger at Evgeni Malkin, arguably the Penguins' 2007-08 regular season MVP, who has only one shot in two games. Fedko's callers were blaming Marc-Andre Fleury for giving up a few less-than-stellar goals. ESPN's Scott Burnside was busy making note of Ryan Malone's four penalties. Ron Cook is so down on the Penguins as a whole that he wants to know if it's too early to pick the Red Wings in three.

Everyone has theories, but no one has answers for how to deal with the Detroit Red Wings. They have outplayed, outhustled, and outscored the Penguins in nearly every facet of the game.

So the Penguins return home to Pittsburgh battered and bruised, their egos undoubtedly damaged. In what's becoming a recurring theme among the scratched, Georges Laraque was the latest to voice his opinion. Therrien and his coaches will go back to the drawing board, possibly juggling lines once again. What impact these events have had and will have on the Penguins' locker room is unknown to anyone who doesn't have access inside that sacred ground.

The bottom line is that the Red Wings aren't this good and the Penguins obviously aren't this bad. The shots for the Pens on Monday night were nearly as bad as in Game One: 6, 6, and 10, outshot 34-22 by the Wings. But just getting shots doesn't guarantee anything, because flopping Detroit goalie Chris Osgood has stopped every shot he's faced thus far.

Is the series over? Absolutely not, according to Max Talbot: "Look at me. I am really positive. We are going home, and that is a great thing. It is not like we lost two games at home. We lost the two away games. I think we got some good scoring chances. It could have went one side or the other."

I can only hope Talbot believes what he's saying, and watching him over the years, I'm sure he does. Hopefully that attitude is contagious, because the 1971 Chicago Blackhawks are the only team that's failed to win the Cup after winning the first two games at home. And if Detroit joins that team in history, that will be a Blame Game I'd love to see.

The Links:

PG:

Penguins face huge odds in trying to overcome 2-0 deficit

Penguins Q&A with Dave Molinari

Reputations falling as fast as Penguins

Detroit's domination has Penguins dazed, confused

Game Two: Stanley Cup Final photos

Red Wings: Babcock promises a better performance at Mellon Arena despite two practically flawless games

Detroit's domination has Penguins dazed, confused

Laraque unhappy with not playing

Trib:

Game 2: Scoreless Pens lose again (with Photo Gallery)

Starkey: Pens, Malkin fail to respond

Detroit Free Press:

Mitch Albom: Wings just two wins away from Cup

Angry Pens take verbal shots at Osgood

Franzen's return is one more headache for Penguins

ESPN:

Machinelike Wings taking life out of Penguins, Cup finals

Cherry/Melrose

The Crosby File

Pens look to regroup

TSN:

Just Two Good

Video: Highlights: PIT 0, DET 3

Video: The Breakdown

Video: A Little Bad Blood

Video: Podium: Sidney Crosby

Video: Podium: Michel Therrien

Video: Podium: Mike Babcock

Penguins still looking for first goal of Final

We’ve Got Enough Media Hype Here, Thank You

by The Backyard Scrawler

backyardscrawl@gmail.com

There’s something oxymoronic and just plain moronic about The Week Leading Up To The Big Game. Were you at all surprised that a credentialed scribe-to-be wearing a wedding gown proposed to each team’s quarterback at Media Day? Are you at all alarmed that most of the questions were about the “hype” and the enormity of the game rather than the actual game?

Gisele's not going to be happy about this

Didn’t think so.

The farcical fodder of this football fortnight –– alliteration, can you feel it!?!? –– is trivial enough to break a threshold where it’s OK to be ashamed our own misguided sporting interests. Here’s my question: Why limit this to two weeks?

There’s enough manufactured non-stories covered in Pittsburgh during any given week, and, to a greater extent, enough call-in shows, blogs and message boards to equally blow a story out of proportion and marinate it in our cynicism for awhile.

The media set the tone for discussion and sentiments, but there aren’t enough renouncing voices to squelch every story that makes every yinzer yawn or yak over nothing at all.

So here are a few Pittsburgh musings from This Week In Sports Talk, Newspapers and Television (we’ll call it T.W.I.S.T. ‘N.A.T. –– anagrams, can you feel them!?!?!)

Exhibit A, Item #1 for the week was the Big Ben-Whines Hard controversy. Everyone has taken their side by now, but overlooked is the media’s role. Mark Madden said on his show Monday that Ed Bouchette milked Ward so much that he was probably mooing by the end of the interview.

Was Bouchette really creating The Jerry Springer Show on the pages of the Post-Gazette to keep the Steelers in the news? Not when “The Dean” of pro football writers has been known to throw a wet sopping blanket on several hot rumors and ideas. Let’s be real. Half, no, make that more than half (726 words for 55%, I counted), of that article was quoted material by Hines. Remember after Ward broke the Steelers receptions record and talked unsolicited for 20 minutes about himself during the post-game? Yeah, that’s what happened.

Edd-ie, Edd-ie!

This story should not have any legs –– or at least short, possession receiver legs –– for as long as it has. Sorry, John Fedko, this is not going to send “shockwaves” into mini-camp and even into training camp in August.

Submitted for your approval

That, by the way, was my early favorite for Mind-Numbing Exaggeration of the Week until KDKA’s Rob Pratte told FSN viewers that watching the story of “The Game” between Central Catholic and Gateway will “change your life forever.” (That’s explains why my girlfriend left me, but that dadgum hook-and-lateral play there at the end sure did get me right with Jesus again. Thanks, Rob.)

So Hines Ward is diminutive and dismissive. Here are some other musings from the week of Pittsburgh sports media:

Hey, look Pitt has two talented athletes in two different sports, and, you’ll never believe it –– this is where it gets good –– they are both FRESHMEN. Thank you, Post-Gazette, for that revelation. Oh, and you too, Tribune-Review.

Why are people so thrilled –– and in some cases appalled –– about the Pitt women’s basketball team making the front-page, above-the-fold of the P-G?

Joe Starkey has a nifty proposition for all your all-star game fans who are waxing existential.

Dejan, those people who approached you with a “curious glare” at PirateFest, they feel sorry for you being the Bucco beatwriter. If I were you I would stop answering Q&A and start writing obituaries to practice for the season.

Finally, here are my favorite calls on late-night TV sports call-in shows from the week:

Rich from Coraopolis on the Subway Nightly Sport Call claimed –– admitted, more like –– to working in the Pirates front office during the Cam Bonifay Era. He suggested the Pirates sink $5 million into training facilities in Pittsburgh rather that the Dominican Republic. Great idea, Rich, train no-talent ballplayers in the few warm months we have so they can be drafted by other teams. Latin American players are better and exempt from the draft.

Jim from Upper St. Clair, also on the Nightly Sports Call (see a pattern here), was happy to tell us about his arthritic hip and his hip replacement surgery. He suspected that Steelers LB Lawrence Timmons has the same problem after hearing about his symptoms and suggested that the Steelers were hiding something. Yeah, Jimbo, they drafted him when he was only 20-years-old because he’s quickly mutating into a middle-aged retiree from the suburbs. I wondered why Timmons was wearing that “Ask Me About My Grandchildren” shirt.

Stan from Blawnox (probably not) tried to ask newbie-host Jory Rand if the signing of Kris Beech off waivers meant there would be a fire lit under him and former love interest Sonni Abatta. Jory, without missing a beat, answered as if the caller left off the word “and Sonni Abatta” from the question.

If she married Kris, would she be "Sonni Beech"?

Finally, Mike, on the Fedko Fone Zone –– who sounded like Chris from the Family Guy and still came across more informed than the host –– asked three or four questions with the word “awesome” in it and after interrupting Fedko mid-sentence said “I gotta go, man.” You have to love a call-in show when the inmates run the asylum and the host sways back and forth with his hands in his pockets and talks to some inaudible off-camera voice that answers to “Digby.”

Is that you, Mike?

That’s all for now … I’ll hang up and listen to your comment.

A Sincere Thank You

I just wanted to take a moment and thank the Mondesi's House readers for all of the emails I've received this week in regard to my mailbag column on Wednesday.

While at the hospital to be examined for a fall, doctors discovered a 2 cm tumor on my future mother-in-law's brain. Within just a few days, it was apparent that she would need brain surgery to remove the mass. Luckily, being from Pittsburgh, there is never a shortage of incredible doctors. She was operated on by Dr. Amin Kassam, who is basically the Michael Jordan of brain surgery. Kassam pioneered a minimally-invasive surgery to remove tumors through the nose as opposed to an incision. We were very fortunate to be paired with Dr. Kassam for this procedure.

While this is a difficult time, I am a positive person and cite all the things that I consider "lucky" in her situation, such as the minor accident that took us to the hospital, the fact that the tumor was benign and completely removed, and the excellent and timely work done by Dr. Kassam, who squeezed her in as his 6th surgery on Monday before a trip out of town.

It has certainly been a trying time for all of us, and as I mentioned the other day, that is why my postings have been few and far between of late. I know this is personal information, but at this point, this site has the feelings of a family anyway. The volume of emails I received from readers who I've never met before were staggering, especially considering they didn't know who was ill, or what their illness was. It's obvious that we have made a personal connection. I am a part of your day, and you are a part of mine.

I owe a huge thank you to Mr. John Fedko, the WPXI (Pittsburgh NBC affiliate) sports director and host of the nightly Fedko Fone Zone talk show. I have never met John, I've only mentioned him a few times on the site. But on Wednesday night, he gave his thoughts and prayers to my family during his show. I know we certainly have no shortage of media personalities that we're all critical of, but it's worth mentioning when we find one of the good guys. And John Fedko is a class act.

Once again, I thank all of you for your support, as does my family. Don't fret, there's plenty of coverage on the way as I try to get caught up, including some neat surprises this afternoon.

I'm Back

It's been a tough couple of days around here. The power outage on Tuesday was one thing, but in the meantime, I've been dealing with a very difficult illness in the family for the past two weeks. Let's just say I've become very familiar with the UPMC campus.

If you've noticed, my postings have been rather random...one here, one there, some links...no real rhyme or reason. When I've had a rare moment to post something, it's been a great distraction for me from what I've been dealing with.

When I miss an entire day (like I did on Tuesday) and see that 2,634 people visited the site that day alone, I feel like I'm letting down a tremendous amount of people. I know this little speech has absolutely nothing to do with sports, and that many of you have no interest in this and want me to get with the funny, but I felt the need to share what's been happening. That's my style. And if you've read me with any regularity, you knew that already.

Now that that's behind us, let's try to return to some level of normalcy with that long post my brother promised on my behalf.

--The power outage on Tuesday forced me to take to the road, and it landed me at my parents' house in beautiful Fayette County. This meant the first Pirate game of 2007 that I took in with my father and brother.

My dad is the eternal Pirate optimist. He's sold himself on so many Pirates turning into serviceable players, I've lost track. I think he lost me forever with Adam Hzydu. He's always a treat to watch a game with, because we usually end up debating each other for most of the game...in good fun, of course. My brother, on the other hand, has officially evolved into a fantasy baseball addict. In between commercials for the new FSN studios on the Pirate game (I believe I counted 2,000 tonight), we were treated to a few random at-bats from the big Braves-Nationals game on TBS. Hey, we gotta keep tabs on Jeff Francoeur (he had a homer and 5 RBI, for the two of you who care).

Tuesday's Pirate game was what I would call a blogger's dream/Pirate fan's nightmare. This is the kind of effort that just kills a team and their fans but gives plenty of fodder for second guessing.

THE story of the night (through seven innings, at least) was the pitching of Tom Gorzelanny. Despite the fact that he never seems to close his mouth (anyone else ever notice this?), Gorzo pitched seven innings, yielding just four hits and no runs, while striking out five, including Mr. Pooholes twice. As a reward for his effort, he was treated to watching his inept teammates fumble away the very 2-0 lead that he had worked so hard for.

Gorzo?

ESPN.com fingers Salomon Torres as the goat of the game, but I have some issues with that. This was a team collapse, from their awful manager on down. We'll start, though, with Jason Bay. Bay, by many accounts, is the foundation of the team. You would think he would have some common-sense baseball knowledge, especially being in the position I just described.

So let's set the scene: top of the 9th, Torres on for the save, 2-0 Pirates lead. Eckstein singles, Duncan walks. First and second, no one out, with an appearance by one Albert Pujols pending (he of the 19 HR at PNC Park since 2001). Pujols flies out to Bay in left field, Eckstein tags, and Bay manages a meek throw to third base, neglecting to throw the ball to second base and holding Duncan at first. So instead of having first and third, Duncan moves up to second on Bay's poor decision, and we're now faced with second and third. Might I add a hat tip to Jack Wilson for not lining up Bay for a throw to second, instead directing him to third. That's some great fundamental baseball by another "team leader".

Next up is the red-goateed Scott Spiezio, who, of course, singled to right, scoring two.

Scott Spiezio: consider sexy brought back

Tie game, but the Pirates still have a chance in the bottom of the ninth...which they promptly burn through. What, you expect Klopek to win the game?

Also, it's worth noting that Bay's brain freeze came moments after he killed an eighth-inning rally by grounding into a double play. You'd think if anyone was prepared for a cold-weather game, it would be someone from Canada, but I guess that's not the case.

So we go to extra frames, and the Pirates somehow compose themselves for a rally in the bottom of the 10th. With Big Country Eldred and Chris Duffy reaching in consecutive at-bats, the Pirates have something cooking. Two on, none out, and the heart of the order around the corner. With the 3B and 1B playing for the bunt, up steps Jack Wilson...who promptly bunts right into a fielder's choice, as Eldred is forced out at third. Mr. Tracy, any explanation for the gift of an out for no apparent reason? Continuing their unclutch evening, Freddy Sanchez struck out, and Jason Bay topped Freddy's effort by striking out in especially awful fashion. Two on, none out, and you score no runs. Sorry Buccos, but you deserved this loss. Well, everyone except Tom Gorzelanny.

--I was watching the Fedko Fone Zone after the game (which opened, yet again, with a prominent endorsement of Mondesishouse.com by host John Fedko), and a great point was made: why was Adam LaRoche starting this game instead of Eldred? LaRoche is hitting .097. He's 3-for-31. St. Louis is starting a lefty. I'm sure LaRoche will eventually get it turned around, but wouldn't tonight be a good opportunity to give Eldred some time at first? Wait, I forgot, Jim Tracy knows more than us. Scratch that idea. And remember, bunt with two on and the corner infielders in your face.

--OK, FSN, we get it: you have a new studio. I beg you, please, enough with the moving-in spot.

Seriously, I have FSN on the brain so much, I actually had the thought that Rob King's ample jawline makes him resemble Family Guy's Glenn Quagmire.

--I think the upcoming Pens-Senators series has all the makings of a classic. Bryan Murray can't seem to keep his trap shut, and apparently he hasn't learned that an angry Sidney Crosby usually means curtains for the opposition.

I like what I've seen/heard from Therrien so far, saying that "all the pressure is on the Senators". And I think the playoffs is a time when you'll really appreciate a guy like Gary Roberts, if you don't already.

Tonight, 7 PM, in Ottawa. I know you'll be watching.

--Well, it's probably time to get to your mail...here is a sampling of some of the best I've received in the past few days...

--Patrick from Denison U. was one of several who sent their thoughts on Don Kelly, the subject of last week's mailbag:

"Donny Kelly actually went to Mount Lebanon High School and is one of my best friend's older brother. He is one of the hardest workers and nicest kids I have ever been around. The entire family is sick athletically speaking. Their sister went to Quinnipiac and is the conference's all-time leading rebounder or something. Andy, my friend, can jump higher than any white kid I have ever met."

Hey, no need to sell me. I'm a fan...more for the off the field stuff, but a fan nonetheless (due to the reasons I outlined last week). The official "Don Kelly Hit Watch" has begun (so far, no, nothing yet).

But try selling his good points to some of the other Pirate-related blogs and message boards. Might be a tougher sell than ol' Mondesi.

--Becky from Parts Unknown chimed in on Large Benjamin Roethlisberger:

"Fun is great, but he already had his little tv tour this offseason and blew off half of last week's workouts playing golf in Cali. You would think that he wants to prove the naysayers wrong. His work ethic DOES suck. And if he's gonna blow off being a leader for his team, the least he could do is look happy. He looks more intersted in that freaking icecream bar than his girlfrend. Idiot. Here's to 8-8 again..."

I have many thoughts in my head about the state of the Steelers. I think that's going to be a seperate column for another day. But count Becky among the growing amount of Steelers fans questioning Big Ben's love of the game.

Personally, I don't think he's a Peyton Manning, all-day, all-night film study guy who eats, sleeps, and breathes football. Doesn't particularly look like the finest physical specimen on the planet, either. I think he's more in the category of "shows up when the lights come on", and that rubs some fans the wrong way. There's a perception that he's done more partying/travelling this offseason than after the Super Bowl, and I'm not the registrar of Roethlisberger's comings and goings (that would be this site), but I would probably agree with that.

Listen, a guy is entitled to some free time. As demanding as the NFL life is, I fully expect players to enjoy their leisure time in a non-Making-it-Rain-with-PacMan way. But coming off of a bad season by most accounts, Ben's very public offseason is going to agitate some Steeler fans. That's just reality.

*By the way, Becky included a pic of Big Ben eating an ice cream bar while in full Sean John gear, hence the reference to said "freaking icecream bar" in her email.

--Longtime reader TJ from Cleveland checked in with this:

"I went to the Cavs game last night with my sister for her b-day, and as we were walking to our seats, right in front of us was this couple. The guy was probably 6'4'', and his wife was one of the hottest women I've ever seen, ever. Anyway, the guy turns around, and its Kellen Winslow. He's lean; not as big as I thought he might be. He seemed pretty cordial; people were calling out his name and he was waving and smiling and stuff. What made me laugh though was that he was rocking a fedora; I don't know if he was going for the D-Wade look or the K-Fed look.

During the game they panned the crowd and put a picture of him at his seat on the scoreboard, which got a mixed reaction of cheers and jeers. I don't know how I'd feel about that if I was an athlete/celeb - I guess its a double-edged sword. On one hand, you just want to go to the game with as few distractions as possible, but on the other hand, when you're at that status, you just have to accept the fact that it will happen."

If I were a member of the Browns, any reaction involving cheers would have to be looked upon as a huge success, especially if I were Kellen Winslow II.

--TJ also sent along this virtual kick in the nuts to Cleveland fans: the website "God Hates Cleveland Sports". He describes it as "kind of like Mondesi's House, but for Cleveland". Hey, watch it. At least our teams win something from time to time other than the draft lottery (which we also win---cough---sidney crosby---cough---).

I know, Lebron's going to play for real now that the playoffs are ready to start. And then you can send me another recap of Kellen Winslow at the playoff game. But this time, remember, a picture of a fedora'd-KWII would be even better than a recap.

--Brad sent along the website http://www.yourtvlinks.com/:

"Has almost every tv show or cartoon one can imagine available for online viewing."

Wow...Brad really doesn't want anyone reading this site to get any work done today. But thanks for the link...cool site.

--A popular submission was anything relating to the Colin Cowherd-Thebiglead.com situation. I think Cowherd was out of line for what he did, I think he deserved disciplinary action from ESPN, and I think The Big Lead should explore possible legal angles. Great write-up from the ESPN Ombudswoman on the topic.

--PacMan, PacMan, PacMan. I received this link numerous times today. So tell me, what exactly is PacMan Jones going to do with himself over the next year? May I suggest Head Recruiter for Coach Huggins? Why not help his Alma Mater?

--A few people sent over the link from Teapot Dome Scandal entitled "LaRoche Unable to Handle Pressure of Playing in Pittsburgh". LaRoche? Heck, I'm still wondering if Jason Bay can handle the pressure.

*After you read that piece, remember, I officially declared Shawn Chacon a "True Pirate" on August 10, 2006.

--Also a popular submission: the Bob Huggins-Kansas State "reaction" article.

Best line:

"As Huggins officially changed jobs again, purple-clad fans sipped Boulevard beers, watched college baseball and quietly moved on. Kris Smith, the general manager at Kite's Bar and Grill, said Thursday night was rowdy. Some angry fans at a bar down the street tried to get screwdrivers and yank a picture of Huggins off the wall. "

Yikes. And for those of you who missed it, you may want to check out my little list of Huggins' various indesrections from last week. West Virginia...wild and wonderful.

--Bill from Pittsburgh sent this story about a PA teacher suing over a fake Myspace page created by one of his students.

--Doug thinks you should know about Carmen Electra's new naked wrestling league. No, Kurt Angle is not in it...yet.

--Sam in Mt. Lebanon sends over this montage of the Pens' 2006-07 season. The only problem: it's incomplete without Jim Balsillie's opening-night s-bomb. But seriously, some great stuff here.

--I can always count on David M. from Mississippi to provide me with some great news of the weird. We'll take you out with some of his findings of late:

2nd-hand flatulence prompts new butts-out policy

Dating website for the mentally ill

Carmen Electra has girl crush

Can't Name Their Baby "Metallica"

Memphis Belle arrested (you have to click for the pic)

The mailbag is here to stay! As always, you can send your thoughts on anything to mondesishouse@gmail.com for the next installment. And please include your city and state if you can.

Mondesi's House Reaffirms Fedko Endorsement

When I mentioned the nightly television experience known as the Fedko Fone Zone in that 3,000+ word essay yesterday, I had no idea of the impact that would ensue with the subject. John Fedko, in describing his show on the air last night, billed it as "The Fedko Fone Zone...endorsed by Mondesi's House".

Unfortunately, I was unable to watch this live, but my brother, the loyal Fedko fan who introduced me to the show, caught it and immediately gave me a call. Of course, I was thrilled at the news. I can name a decent number of Pittsburgh sports media members that are visitors to the site, and I never knew Fedko was among that group. So I certainly thank John for the on-air mention.

That being said, I am officially reaffirming my endorsement of the Fedko Fone Zone, which airs after the 11 PM news every night on PCNC. In all seriousness, if you're a fan of Mondesi's House, you'll "get" why I like the Fedko show so much. The mix of Fedko and the callers...it's unlike anything else on Pittsburgh television. It's appointment television in my household.

John Fedko Hasn't Given Up Hope

During my usual late-night chat with my dad over the state of our respective teams, he told me that WPXI's John Fedko went on a five-minute rant about how the Steelers are still alive. My dad said that Fedko claimed the Steelers could still win the division with a 9-7 record. That would require a team that has played 2-6 ball to finish 7-1 down the stretch against the likes of Baltimore (twice), Cincinnati, New Orleans, and Carolina.

Submitted for your approval: John Fedko's sanity

Why commentators such as Fedko are making such outlandish claims is beyond me. How anyone can look at this team and think it can flick a switch is ridiculous. This isn't Shaq playing harder once the playoffs come around; this is a complete team collapse: offense, defense, special teams, and coaching. Anyone saying the Steelers still have a chance is just hurting their own credibility.

The Monday Night game tonight actually further illustrated the Steelers' sorry plight. I still cannot fathom the fact that they lost to the Raiders. Cannot, cannot, cannot believe it. Honestly, tonight Oakland looked like they don't even belong in the NFL. Their offense hasn't scored a touchdown since Randy Moss reeled in a 32-yarder in the first quarter against Arizona on October 22. That's 11 quarters without an offensive TD, for those of you counting at home. QB Andrew Walter was sacked nine times. His body language screamed of a beaten man. At least he managed not to throw any INTs. Their offensive line is ridiculously bad. Lamont Jordan had just nine carries. If I'd ever seen a hopless team, this was it. Forget talk about the Denver loss ending the season. The Oakland loss was the last nail in the coffin of the 2006 Steelers.

Seperated at Birth: Andrew Walter and Office Space's Ron Livingston

After watching a full half of the Raiders-Seahawks debacle, it was time for some hockey. The Pens took on the Anaheim "Don't Call Us Mighty" Ducks with a 10 PM EST start. For some reason, Mad Mike Therrien chose tonight to give Jocelyn Thibault his first start of the season. He managed to stop 37 shots (Thibault, not Therrien), but had me nervous on more than one occasion, with the Ducks having at least two more potential goals hit the post. But the Pens hung tough and managed to steal a point by taking the Ducks to OT. The highlight of the night had to be Nils Ekman's series of uppercuts on a Duck in front of the net with about 5 minutes left in regulation. Ekman was then tackled by Chris Pronger, who was tackled by Maxime Talbot, who was tackled by yet another Duck. Unfortunately, a questionable tripping call in OT to Noah Welch gave the Ducks one last power play, and Teemu Selanne (he of the golf course in his front yard) ended this one just 21 seconds into the extra frame. Next up is Tampa on Wednesday night. Hopefully Dan Potash didn't tire the guys out too much in California.

Sports aside, the high point of my evening was a 7 PM showing of Borat at the Destinta Theater in scenic Bridgeville, one of the 837 chosen theaters for the first week of release. There was a pretty strong turnout, considering this was a Monday night and we were in Bridgeville. I was actually carded upon buying my tickets, which is amazing considering I'll be 30 next year. And believe it or not, this theater did not have anyone taking your tickets. You could have virtually walked right in and no one would have noticed. But I recommend you pay. Because this movie was worth every penny and then some. No spoilers here, though. I will give you a great read: the "real" Borat and his frustrating story.
The "real" Borat is confused