Today's Headlines

Lots to cover after the jump, with the latest Steeler camp links, one former Steeler reaching a deal elsewhere, a Pitt-in-Ireland update, and eye-popping numbers from our Battlin' Bucs...

FREE AGENTS TO INCLUDE CLARK, PARKER, TOWNSEND, RANDLE-EL

An interesting season of free agency starts on Friday in the NFL, and on the football fan's version of Christmas Eve, a few final moves were made (and not made) before the action starts.

The Steelers were not able to reach terms on a deal with S Ryan Clark, so he will officially hit the open market on Friday. The 30-year-old Clark was a starter since his arrival in 2006 and has certainly had his share of memorable moments over the years (just ask Wes Welker and Willis McGahee). But his play was criticized in 2009, and he did not take it well, calling the media "turds" and posting an angry fan letter in the locker room. Most recently, he took to the airwaves to publicly discuss the lack of an offer, which came off in a less-than-flattering light. Given this combination of developments and a price tag that's probably above what he's actually worth, it would be no surprise if he has played his last game in a Steeler uniform.

RB Willie Parker will also be a free agent on Friday, and like Clark, has probably seen his Steeler career come to an end. If that's the case, he will leave with 1,253 carries, 5,378 yards, 29 touchdowns, two Super Bowl rings, and the longest touchdown run in Super Bowl history. And his 2007 season of 1,716 yards of offense and 16 touchdowns will go down as one of the greatest performances by a back in team history. Not bad for a guy who didn't get to play in college.

Despite his accomplishments, Parker never quite got the recognition I thought he deserved in Pittsburgh. The fans were used to a certain style of running back, and he was not cast in that mold. Injuries have limited Parker to just 14 games over the past two seasons, and it's pretty clear to see the writing on the wall in his case. The team finally started seeing a return on their Rashard Mendenhall investment last year, and much like Ladainian Tomlinson, Parker still sees himself as a starter. It's probably inevitable that these two will part ways, but Steeler fans should look back on the Parker Era as a positive one, given that he helped the team to two titles.


CB Deshea Townsend will be hitting free agency on Friday as well, and like Parker, the 34-year-old veteran would part with two rings if this is the end of the line in Pittsburgh. His signature moment was a 2008 pick-six against Dallas in a huge game at Heinz Field, which was one of the more memorable plays in the brief history of the stadium.

Finally, a former Steeler will be hitting free agency tomorrow, as the Redskins released WR Antwaan Randle-El. Randle-El famously helped the Steelers on their path to Super Bowl XL, and subsequently cashed in on a seven-year, $31 million contract with Dan Snyder's Monopoly money shortly thereafter.

Like many players, Randle-El did not experience the same success in Washington that he had with his previous employer. He ran back five kicks/punts for touchdowns while in Pittsburgh, and just one in Washington; he played in a disorganized Redskin offense that was in a constant state of confusion, much like the entire team during his time there; and he played in just one playoff game, a 35-14 loss to Seattle in the 2007-08 postseason.

Yes, Randle-El got paid, and paid handsomely. But now he will have to find a new market for his services at the age of 30. Sometimes the grass is not always greener on the Washington side of the fence, but good luck telling that to the inevitable players that will quickly take Snyder's money this year.

Just a quick reminder to check back often on Friday, as I'll be monitoring the start of free agency and posting the latest news - not that the Steelers will be making any of it.

Steelers safety Clark to hit open market [Trib]

Redskins make it official -- 10 are gone, 10 are tendered [PFT]

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STEELERS SIGN FERNANDO BRYANT

The Steelers finally signed a veteran D-back, and it wasn't DeAngelo Hall or Ty Law. It's Fernando Bryant, a 10-year veteran who was a first round pick of the Jacksonville Jaguars in 1999. His roster spot was created by the release of LB Donovan Woods, who was signed on Saturday to take RB Najeh Davenport's place on the roster. And so goes As the 53rd Roster Spot Turns.

Bryant, who played at the University of Alabama alongside Deshea Townsend, has been on the rosters of both Detroit and New England in 2008. For some reason, my only memory of Bryant was a trash-talking incident during a particularly heated Steelers-Jags game with fellow 1999 rookie Troy Edwards. Here's his Wikipedia page in the event that you'd like to learn more about him.

In other Steeler news, it's looking like Willie Parker and Lamarr Woodley will be back on Sunday against the Chargers. It's also looking like Townsend and TE Heath Miller will not play. And Mike Tomlin is 'hopeful' that Ben Roethlisberger can practice this week.

Send your news, tips, and links to Mondesishouse@gmail.com.

STANLEY CUP A PENGUINS FAN

The Trib did their homework in unearthing an actual Saltsburg man whose name is Stanley Joseph Cup. And to top it off, he's a Pens fan with a tattoo of his namesake on his back.

Stanley Cup, a steel worker who puts in daily 10-hour shifts at the Akers National Roll mill in Avonmore, doesn't think of himself as a talisman. Nope, he said, he's just a regular guy.

OK, let me get this straight: a 59-year-old steelworker named Stanley Cup who happens to be a Penguins fan is out there and he's not being trotted out to every home game? This may be a bigger crime than the banner fiasco.

We also learned today in Penguin Fan News that Steelers DB Deshea Townsend has joined Mayor Ravenstahl in the "Celebrities Looking For Free Tickets" Club.

"I'll just call upstairs and see if they can pull it off," Townsend said of trying to score a few tickets through Steelers executives. "It's a great opportunity to be involved. Those are things you talk about later on in life; you're able to be involved when someone wins a championship."

In addition to Stanley Cup, Naked Flip-Flop Guy, Townsend and Ravenstahl, others are coming out of the woodwork to show their support. Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger plans on attending one of the games in Detroit. Pirates 1B Adam LaRoche recently admitted his new affinity for the game. Casey Hampton nearly broke the glass during the Rangers series. And it was also revealed that both Dan Rooney and Kevin Colbert have season tickets.

As for actual news on the players everyone is behind, here's a few links:

--ESPN is warming up to hockey again. Mike and Mike featured not only Mark Messier, but our very own Sidney Crosby on their show this morning.

--The .com end of the WWL featured Sid on the front page and compared him to Magic and Bird.

--Ryan Malone was featured at length for his blue-collar mentality. Props to Scott Burnside for his fresh angle on a Pittsburgh athlete. Was a smash-mouth Steeler unavailable?

--John Buccigross calls this the ultimate finals. SI's Michael Farber echoes Bucci's sentiments.

--TSN is all about MAF.

--Scotty Bowman is a consultant for the Red Wings and scouted the final three games of Pens-Flyers.

On a side note, he looks more and more like George Costanza:

and BREAKING NEWS!
Mayor Ravenstahl is ---gasp--- paying for his own tickets!

Stanley Cup, 59, backs Penguins [Trib]
Steelers and Pirates supporting Penguins in big way [PG]

The News

--Pens win! Pens win! And more importantly comes the revelation from a reader that Dan Potash may be the Pittsburgh equivalent of TNT's Craig Sager. All he needs is a few loud suits, and he's all set.

--Pitt wins! Pitt wins! The good news: Pitt wasn't upset by Mississippi Valley State, alma mater of Jerry Rice. The bad news: DeJuan Blair left the game with an injured tailbone. The insignificant news: the Pittsburgh XPlosion open their season at the Pete tonight. But you'll have to wait until February 1 to see the Atlanta Krunk.

--Bad news for Barry. But on the bright side, there's that offer from the Wild Things....

--A-Rod stays in pinstripes for 10 more years. So let's recap: first, he interrupts the World Series to announce that he's opting out of his Yankee contract. And now, he steals the headlines from Barry Bonds!

--After six games, ESPN already has a tracker comparing the Celtics to the 1995-96 Bulls. No, they're not overreacting at all...

--Another black eye for Penn State...and from the sounds of it, a black eye for the victim of this beatdown.

--Deshea Townsend: INNOCENT!

--In other Steeler secondary news, Ryan Clark has one less spleen than he used to.

--35-year-old Game Manager Trent Dilfer fights a 22-year-old defensive back at 49er practice yesterday. I'm guessing Mike Tirico would spin this as "the struggling team showing some fight".

--A great blog: Men Who Look Like Old Lesbians

--The one guy who left Sabathia off his Cy Young ballot explains himself.

--What's going on with the NHL All-Star voting free XM preview?

--Great news: you can now text your orders to Papa John's.

--Here's a quick site to figure out your BMI (Body Mass Index). I'm hoping for your health's sake that most of you come in at "normal weight" as opposed to "obesity".

--From the Headline Says It All Department: "Woman Finds Boyfriend Dead In Cat Door"

--If the words Ninja Gaiden, Double Dribble, and Baseball Stars ring a bell, it's time for you to take Nintendo Historian Quiz 2.

A LIST OF TODAY'S TOP LISTS:

The 8 Guys You Run Into at a Sports Book

The 25 Most Baffling Toys From Around the World

The 9 Most Racist Disney Characters

Steeler Line Coach Making a Name For Himself

I usually don't post anything else on mailbag days, but this one is too big to ignore. In a story broken by profootballtalk.com, it has been revealed that new Steelers O-Line coach Larry Zierlein sent a pornographic e-mail to every GM in the league (and their secretaries) as well as Commish Goodell.

An excerpt from their original story:

A league source tells us that an assistant coach with an NFL team attempted on Friday to forward a pornographic e-mail.

If his goal was to send it to every General Manager in the league, he was successful.

The list also included their secretaries. Oh, and the Commissioner got it, too.

We know who the coach is, but we're not going to reveal the name until we get confirmation from one more source as to the coach's identity.

Said the source: "I'm really shocked it hasn't hit the papers. Someone is doing a great job covering it up. But the whole league knows about it."

And now, an update, after PFT decided to name Zierlein:

The e-mail message had been forwarded to him by Doug Whaley, the Steelers director of personnel. Whaley had received the video from someone outside of the organization, and Whaley forwarded it to multiple other persons, including Zierlein.

Again, it's not for us to decide whether this behavior runs afoul of the new personal conduct policy as applied to coaches and front office personnel. Assuming, however, that the NFL has a written policy regarding the use of company computer equipment for personal endeavors, the use of the steelers.com domain to forward the video in question surely was a violation.

This will be quite an interesting quandary for the Steelers, often looked at as a franchise with high moral values. Do they fire Zierlein and Whaley? Suspend them? Do nothing at all?

Don't forget, this is the same organization that reportedly had ESPN Radio's Mark Madden fired for calling Deshea Townsend a "jackass". And if this e-mail story is true, then I can't imagine the Steelers standing idly by with a "no comment". This isn't anywhere close to dogfighting, and I'm sure Zierlein didn't intend to send his email to the commissioner, among others. But it's a very embarrassing story to say the least. And much worse than Madden's comment.

Locally, this has received minimal coverage, outside of Madden mentioning it on his Tuesday show. With the NFL behavior microscope examining everyone closer than ever, this will surely be a prominent national story in the next 24 hours...you know, something you'll see dissected on shows like Around the Horn and PTI. I'll be interested to see what angle, if any, the local outlets will take with this. It will be a good barometer as to the power of PFT's seemingly growing credibility.

The Afternoon Killer

Deshea: "I'm innocent!"

Aaron Gray is one of approximately 89 players on the Big East first team. Seriously, have you ever seen an honorary team so deep?

Pirate Cuban defector Yoslan Herrera is among their first cuts. Also sent to the minors: first round picks Bryan Bullington, John Van Benschoten, and Brad Lincoln.

Shelly Anderson elaborates on the Erik Christensen goal celebration

Are the Pirates the baseball equivalent of Ghost Rider?

One thing PC users can do that Mac users can't: shut the F up

The Ron Artest Mug Shot is now online

Peyton Manning is not above getting paid for a sweet 16 party appearance.

Here's a conspiracy theory on the new uniforms several teams will sport this week


For the anti-Yankee contingent, here's a page full of "Yankees suck" jokes

Dwyane Wade is getting up again

Did you know Bonnie Bernstein almost died in October?

Here's a study linking tooth brushing to seizures. This is great news for the residents of (___________) insert redneck state of your choice here.

In honor of today's Borat DVD release, here's a deleted scene of Borat getting a massage

DON'T FORGET TO SEND YOUR INTERESTING LINKS TO mondesishouse@gmail.com and enter the weekly prize contest!

Steelers Staying Busy in Offseason

They're not quite as active as the Denver Broncos, but the Steelers have been moderately busy the last few days.

First, the Trib is reporting that Steeler DB Deshea Townsend and practice-squadder Raymond Burgess were arrested at 1:45 AM Friday following an altercation at Margarita Mama's in Station Square.

Burgess and Graham began fighting and Townsend jumped into the fray, said police spokeswoman Diane Richard.

"Mr. Burgess threw punches, hitting Mr. Graham in the face," Richard said. "As he was beating Mr. Graham, Mr. Townsend jumped in and started hitting the victim with a closed fist in the head and face."

Second, in a completely unrelated story, let's check in some other Steelers' offseason workout programs, at the workout capital of the world, Las Vegas:

Finally, Ben warms up his right arm for the 2007 campaign by waving to the crowd at the ESPN: The Weekend Disney World Parade.

Welcome to the NFL, Mike Tomlin.

UPDATE...from profootballtalk.com:

TRIBUNE-REVIEW PULLS A NEW MEDIA TRICK
"At a time when the old media loves to criticize the new media for getting stuff wrong and/or making sh-t up, a member of the old media pulled a decidedly new media trick by revising one of its stories to remove a glaring error that appeared in a prior version.

Earlier on Monday, the Tribune-Review reported that Steelers cornerback Deshea Townsend and practice squad player Raymond Burgess were arrested over the weekend.

But we later learned that Burgess is not, and never has been, a member of the team. Instead, he's a bartender at the club where the fight occurred."

And, apparently, we're right. Because the Tribune-Review story has been revised, with no reference to the fact that it ever said that Burgess played for the Steelers.
Nicely done.

Hard to believe that the same paper that told us Russ Grimm was hired as head coach could make such a mistake.

The $22.5 Million Backup

We all know about his background. Uncle Francois forcing him to work out until 2 AM as a teenager. Lining his backyard with baking flour to truly understand the dimensions of a football field. Chasing rabbits to increase his speed. Yes, Ike Taylor truly was the Cinderella story of the Pittsburgh Steelers. He worked his way from Louisiana-Lafayette to 4th round pick to starter for the Super Bowl champions. He signed a 5-year, $22.5 million contract before the season. And now he's backing up Bryant McFadden, while Deshea Townsend inexpicably remains in the starting lineup.

Yes, these are crazy times here in Steeler Land. It seems that our future Hall of Fame coach felt the need to shake up the roster. Instead of extracting Deshea "Swing and a Whiff on Javon Walker" Townsend from the starting cornerback position, Ike Taylor becomes the scapegoat for the demise of the 2006 Steelers season.

Cowher chose not to demote Townsend because Cowher is a big "dues" guy. Townsend played all those years as a nickelback and Mr. Bill is rewarding him for his loyalty, plain and simple. In his fourth year as a pro, Taylor is a virtual pup in the eyes of his coach when compared to the nine years of service that Townsend has clocked.

While Taylor certainly did not play well on Sunday against Denver, neither did most of the Steelers. Cowher wants to shuffle the deck, and someone who has struggled was going to take the fall, fair or unfair. And since he can't bench all 22 starters (unless you want to see Charlie Batch handing off to Najeh Davenport and throwing to Nate Washington), something like this was bound to happen. Frankly, I'm surprised Cowher has waited until the ninth game to make a change, and I'd be equally surprised if he stopped at one change.

Steelers-Chargers: The Blame Game

It was a big night in San Diego. Steelers fans got to finally see the 2006 version of MartyBall, which I would assume is BeamerBall without all the blocked punts and kick returns; Philip Rivers chose tonight to "come out", according to John Madden; (probably just a coincidence, but it happened in the same year Mike Piazza signed with San Diego); and the Pittsburgh Steelers took another step in their quest for a top 10 draft pick in 2007, dropping a 23-13 Sunday nighter to the San Diego Super Chargers. I think that's their official name, but that's only because I get all my football information from Chris Berman.

Other than football, the game of choice for Pittsburghers is the Blame Game. It's fun. Pick out one or more Steelers or their opponents, and see who you can pin the loss on. The winner of game three was Ricardo Colclough. For his work, he received a round-trip ticket to injured reserve for a "neck injury" (wink, wink). Your candidates for Game Four:

1. Ricardo Colclough. Wait, that was last week. I guess he's not the entire problem after all.

2. Najeh Davenport. Three touches, zero closet-defecation incidents. He has been a disappointment on and off the field this season.

3. Bill Cowher. I don't know how to say this about our beloved leader, but he coached with all the emotion of Art Shell on Sunday night.

4. Ken Whisenhunt. Whenever Bryant McFadden shows up in the rushing statistics, that's not a winning gameplan.

5. Ben Roethlisberger. Roethlisberger's accomplished so much in his career, he's running out of goals. So this year, he set out to top Alex Smith's 2005 TD to INT ratio. The problem is that Smith's ratio was 1 TD to 11 INT.

6. The Offensive Line. 68 yards rushing? The Raiders had more in week one, and I think they play in the PAC-10 now.

7. Troy Polamalu. He hasn't been himself this year. I'm convinced that he really injured his shoulder in that Briscoe High game when he tackled Ladainian Tomlinson out of bounds.

8. Deshea Townsend's parents. Shame on you for having a son that only grew to 5'10". If he were a little taller, he could've defended the touchdown that 6'5" Malcolm Floyd came down with. Congratulations, you've let down an entire city.

9. Marty Schottenheimer. Cowher studied under Schottenheimer, who has lost games so many different ways it has become an art form. So in a way we can lay the blame at his doorstep.

10. The Defense. Dick Lebeau had an interesting gameplan: let's hold Tomlinson to 36 yards rushing and see if we can still figure out a way to lose. Unfortunately, this was the only gameplan the Steelers executed properly on Sunday.

More thoughts after yet another national embarrassment:

...I like the developments of watching the Steelers on national TV every week. We have a new feature, which I like to call the "Ben Flip-Flop". After a good throw early on, "Announcer X" pronounces with vigor, "Now you can definitively say Big Ben is back. Look at that throw. His confidence is restored." Of course, when he throws the inevitable second-half interception, the very same announcer will pronounce (again, with vigor): "Roethlisberger still looks rusty. You can tell he's not fully back yet from the motorcycle accident and appendectomy."

So far, Joe Theismann and John Madden have been able to successfully complete the Ben Flip Flop in front of a national audience. But who will try the Ben Flip Flop next Sunday...Dick Enberg? Randy Cross? Phil Simms? Solomon Wilcots?

...In the spirit of Halloween, here's a ghastly stat breakdown: projected Steeler receiving stats for the season, based on the first four games:

Verron Haynes: 52-264 (5 YPC)

Hines Ward: 52-592 (11 YPC)

Nate Washington: 36-468 (13 YPC)

Heath Miller: 36-672 (18 YPC)

Cedrick Wilson: 24-408 (17 YPC)

Santonio Holmes: 28-292 (10 YPC)

That is some scary stuff.

...Next four games: home vs. Kansas City, at Atlanta, at Oakland (exhibition), home vs. Denver. If by some chance the black and gold can pull three out of four from this group, they'll be 4-4 at the halfway mark. And if they win all of their games, they'll be 13-3. But they have to take it one game at a time right now. There's a chance Kansas City may be missing Larry Johnson and Trent Green next week, which means facing Michael Bennett and Damon Huard. I know it's hard to feel confident about much of anything at this point, but you have to crawl before you can walk. First, the 2006 Steelers need to learn how to crawl. Then they might be able to walk. If not, they'll be on crutches pretty soon.