TJ DUCKETT TO THE STEELERS? NO THANKS

Mark Madden mentioned on his Wednesday radio show that there were rumors of Steeler interest in plus-sized RB T.J. Duckett, and I hope that this is merely that - a rumor. Believe it or not, we are going on our eighth year of Duckett-to-the-Steelers rumors. In fact, I wrote about this very topic three years ago when John Clayton was pushing it so hard I thought he might secretly be Duckett's agent. Keep in mind that while this talk was swirling around in 2006, Parker was in the midst of a season that would end with 1,716 yards of offense and 16 touchdowns. Bah. He's not big enough. We're the blue-collar Steelers. We'll get our best 11, you get your best 11, and we'll punch you in the mouth. And so on.

Back then, I heard the tired cliche of stereotypical "Steeler football" one time too often. In fact, here's exactly what I wrote in response:

The absurdity of hearing "The Steeler Way" in reference to this team is like saying "the Atlanta Falcons must always have a mobile quarterback" or "the Green Bay Packers must always have a gunslinger at QB". Bettis, Michael Vick, and Brett Favre are (or were) all special players. They were who you thought of when a person mentioned the Steelers, the Falcons, and Packers...true faces of their franchises. But the team must adapt at the time those players move on.

Since then, the Falcons drafted a new quarterback, and I think we can all say that it's worked out well for them so far. Matt Ryan trusts his arm more than his legs, a style that completely contrasts that of Vick's. As for the Packers also moved on, and I think it's safe to say Aaron Rodgers' style is a bit more conservative than Brett Favre's. If you don't believe me, look no further than his 28 to 13 touchdown to INT ratio last season.

The Falcons have moved on. The Packers have moved on. But Steeler Nation remains trapped in the vortex of the jumbo back. Please, black and gold bleeders, it's time to move on. The problem with the running game will not be solved with a bigger, slower back who peaked in 2003. T.J. Duckett is not the answer. Jim Brown in his prime would not be the answer to this dilemma. When there aren't holes, the back makes less and less of an impact. Love it or hate it, the Steelers' strength right now is as a passing team. They have one of the game's top quarterbacks, two Super Bowl MVP wide receivers, and one of the league's best tight ends. In fact, the formula works well enough to win a Super Bowl with a running game ranked 23rd just last year. The quicker we get over this fixation, the better we'll feel.

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Someone Has to Stop John Clayton

ESPN football analyst/know-it-all John Clayton just posted his list of underpriced and overpriced free agents, as the signing period is upon us. And for the 1,249th time, John gave us the same tired prediction that T.J. Duckett would go to the Steelers.

I think Clayton is an incredibly smart football guy, basically the pigskin equivalent of baseball Hall of Fame analyst Peter Gammons. But don't forget, Peter Gammons also picked Kris Benson to win the Cy Young Award in 2000. He's good, but he's not perfect. Neither is Clayton.

There have been rumors of Duckett going to the Steelers since the 2002 draft. The Steelers have had five years to make a move for the guy, which has never happened. His yardage has gone from 779 to 509 to 380 to 132 over the past four years. He languished on the Washington sideline last year in a season when Clinton Portis played in only eight games. Simply put, I don't see the infatuation Clayton has with Duckett, other than the fact that he weighs 254 pounds. As I've said before, everyone needs to get over the fact that Jerome Bettis retired and there is no Bettis clone available. Here's the original rant/article I wrote on this topic in December.

I thought Clayton would be smarter than to buy into the tired "Steelers need a big back" cliche, but obviously he's not. But even if the Steelers take the big-back route, I see no reason why they would invest in a veteran who has proven very little in the league as opposed to drafting a younger, cheaper, less-traveled version.

Of course, if they somehow do sign Duckett, I promise to re-post this article with the tagline "John Clayton Knows More Than Me".

Monday Morning Wrapup

Bingles 27, Raiders 10- The Bengals now have as many wins (8) as players arrested, on the heels of CB Deltha O'Neal's DWI on Saturday. On the Raiders side, Randy Moss was injured in this game, so he now has an official reason to mail it in for the rest of the season. By the way, has anyone checked out Moss's 2006 stats lately? 42 catches, 553 yards, 3 TD. How the mighty have fallen.

Eagles 21, Redskins 19- Line of the Day: T.J. Duckett: 3 carries, 1 yard. Can't wait to see him in the black and gold in 2007.

Ravens 20, Chiefs 10- According to the announcers, the Chiefs hadn't lost a home game in December since 1996. On this day, the Chiefs looked like a team that hadn't won a game since 1996. And it wasn't as close as the score would indicate---the Chiefs' lone TD was a Gruden-esque stat-padder in garbage time.

Falcons 17, Bucs 6- Cadillac, Cadillac, wherefore art thou Cadillac? What has happened to the once-proud Bucs RB? The guy who started his career with 434 yards in his first three games? Today's 20 carry, 48 yard effort was his eighth game of less than 50 yards this season. Offensive lines, my friends. Offensive lines.

Jerious Norwood and Warrick Dunn both left early for the Falcons, and early reports are that Norwood could be lost for the season. So if it wasn't scary enough proposition to trust Michael Vick with a good running game to fall back on, try trusting him without a good running game to fall back on.

Vikings 30, Lions 20- If you're looking for amusement, check out the Lions' rushing stats:

Arlen Harris: 1 carry, 0 yards

Kevin Jones: 9 carries, -3 yards

Team totals: 10 carries, -3 yards

Giants 27, Panthers 13- Chris Weinke throws for 423 yards as Jake Delhomme's replacement, but the Panthers managed just 45 yards on the ground. Backup QB, no running game...do you see where I'm going with this, Steeler fans scouting their next opponent?

Jaguars 44, Colts 17- I love when they discuss Peyton Manning on CBS's set. Boomer Esiason always compares him to Dan Marino, and Marino usually looks like he's ready to punch Esiason in the face. If the building pressure of Manning's lack of a postseason legacy wasn't enough, they were exposed for an absolutely horrendous rush defense by the Flying Del Rios. 375 yards rushing? Did they hire Paul Rhoads in Indy?

Dolphins 21, Patriots 0 - Tom Brady: 12 for 25, 78 yards? Outplayed by Joey Blue Skies? Is this Bizarro NFL Season?

Titans 26, Texans 20- The city of Houston gets Vince Young rubbed in their face as he ends overtime with a 39-yard TD run. I know Tony Romo is a great story (before Sunday night), but has any QB change affected a team more than Vince Young in for Kerry Collins? Not only did he completely revive a franchise and their fans, he's done it in dramatic fashion. And while missing team flights, to boot! Maybe he should pretend he dates Jessica Simpson to get some attention.

Cardinals 27, Seahawks 21- Matt Hasselbeck throws for 243 yards and three touchdowns behind the nourishment of his Mom's Chunky Soup, but the Hawks can't overcome a determined Cardinal team playing for a lame duck coach.

On another note, the Seahawks are still waiting for the arrival of WR Nate Burleson, who they signed to a $49 million contract when one of their executives was drunk. That would be the only plausible explanation for a guy who has 15 catches after 13 games.

Bills 31, Jets 13- Buffalo plays the role of spoiler, forcing Chad Pennington into two interceptions while winning their sixth game. That's as many wins as the defending Super Bowl champs, you Marv Levy-bashers.

Packers 30, 49ers 19- The difference in this one was the two yards rushing from former Steeler Noah Herron. Or not. Brett Favre continues to excel since he arranged for Aaron Rodgers' foot to be broken, thus locking Favre in as the starter at least through 2007. That guy just loves to play football. He's a real warrior.

Chargers 48, Broncos 20- Ladainian Tomlinson sets the single-season touchdown record as the Chargers dismember their division rivals. San Diego got a great game from their defense, which boasts two players who have been busted for steroids (Shawne Merriman and Luis Castillo) and another who was arrested on five felony drug counts. They're like the Bengals in training.

Saints 42, Cowboys 17- A great night of John Madden and Al Michaels on NBC. Late in the first half, Madden proclaims Drew Brees "a football player". As we come out of halftime, Michaels goes on a classic rant about the lingering smoke of the halftime show. And following Reggie Bush's 3rd quarter TD, Michaels spews this gem about the Houston Texans fans: "They must be thinking, what in the hell were we doing passing on this guy?"

Despite the fact that he has small hands and smells like cabbage, the Saints' Karney (Mike) went for three touchdowns in the romp. Drew Brees continued to try and steal the MVP from former teammate Ladainian Tomlinson, throwing for 384 yards and 5 TDs. And Tony Romo...he kinda sucked tonight.

Monday Morning Wrapup

My head still hurts from trying to write something interesting about the Steeler game. As I write this, it's 2 AM and I'm just imagining how unproductive my Monday will be, despite all the work I have. The things I do for you guys. What a labor of love. On to the "other games" (that is to say, unworthy of a full writeup like the Steeler game):

Chargers 24, Bills 21- Ladainian Tomlinson racked up 192 yards of total offense and 2 more TDs as the MartyBallers move to 10-2. Good thing Eli Manning turned his back on them 2004...they are losers.

Bears 23, Vikings 13- Want to know the state of quarterbacks in the NFL? This game had appearances by four QBs: Brad Johnson, 73 yards...Brooks Bollinger, 70 yards...Tarvaris Jackson, 35 yards...Rex Grossman, 34 yards. Lovie Smith and Brad Childress---what offensive minds! Also of note: the Bears scored 23 points on just 107 yards total offense, conjuring up memories once again of Steelers-Raiders '06.

Browns 31, Chiefs 28- Trent Green throws four TDs, LJ runs for 110, and the Chiefs still lose to the Browns, who are quarterbacked by a guy named Derek Anderson. At first I thought this was the Derek Anderson that used to play in the NBA, but then I found out that he made $37 million in his career and probably didn't have to attempt a football career to make ends meet.

Jets 38, Packers 10- Imagine you're a Packers fan, you pay big bucks for seats to a home game, and then you lose to the Jets by 28. Do you ask for a refund from your scalper? Is there any sort of legal action you could take? But just think how bad this loss would've been if Favre didn't come back.

Titans 20, Colts 17- Yes, that was former Steeler training camp fodder Rob Bironas kicking a 60-yarder at the gun to beat Indy, while Jeff Reed shanked a 32-yarder on his home field. Also of note in this game: the arrival of full-fledged Vince Young Mania, to commence immediately.

Cardinals 34, Rams 20- The Rams are having an interesting season. They start 4-1, the follow that with a 1-6 run. And now, Marc Bulger is throwing his teammates under the ice cream truck, saying, "I know there's some guys in here who don't care". Marc, you're being too hard on those guys in singling them out. Because it's obvious there's also guys who don't care in Oakland, Arizona, Pittsburgh, Houston, the Giants...

Patriots 28, Lions 20- The Lions actually had the Patriots down after three quarters, then let them off the hook. The Lions threw the ball well, with Jon Kitna throwing for 314 yards. But is anyone else as intrigued as I am at the total disappearance of Lions WR Mike "Best Player in the Draft" Williams? One catch in 2006? That Matt Millen...what a GM.

Saints 34, 49ers 10- The "Bush-Gore" debate (Frank vs. Reggie) finally took shape on the field. Frank outran Reggie, 40-37, but Reggie reeled in 131 yards receiving and added 4 TDs to finally live up to the hype generated by all those Subway ads.

Falcons 24, Redskins 14- Future Steeler TJ Duckett Update: 4 carries, 9 yards. Can't wait to see him behind our line next year. On the Falcon side, Michael Vick had a total of 8 completions and 0 middle fingers.

Texans 23, Raiders 14- I guess someone had to win this game. But I'm amazed that it was Houston, when David Carr threw for a grand total of 32 yards. That would make two QBs this week (Carr and Grossman) throwing for less than 40 in a win.

Jaguars 24, Dolphins 10- Joey Harrington proves he only plays well when he's booed in Detroit, as the 5-7 Dolphins face a minor setback in their annual end-of-the-season surge under Nick Saban.

Cowboys 23, Giants 20- I didn't get to watch this game. I got to watch 4-7 vs. 3-8, also known as Pittsburgh vs. Tampa Bay, since it was moved to 4:15. Thanks, Fox.

Seahawks 23, Broncos 20- Jay Cutler makes an immediate impact, as he is the difference maker in this one. The difference being that if he didn't throw an interception returned for a TD, the Broncos would've won.

The BCS is announced- I love how not once the point was made about Louisville being left out of the national title. I guess a one-loss team from a major conference doesn't mean too much. And the voters agree, as the Cardinals are ranked behind a USC team that lost to two unranked teams. And a 2-loss LSU team. Frankly, I'm surprised they're even ranked above Notre Dame. I love college football.

Monday Morning Wrapup

Redskins 17, Panthers 13- Carolina does just enough to create doubt in their team down the stretch; and did you notice TJ Duckett's 24 yards rushing for the Redskins? All those trade rumors were right: he would have fit right in with the Steelers.

Dolphins 27, Lions 10- If you have zero expectations for a game, and it still underperforms, how do you describe it? How about a recap, which sounds completely made up, but isn't: Joey Harrington getting cobbler from Phil Simms' Mom after a Gatorade shower.

Cowboys 38, Bucs 10- Before Tony Romo's head gets too big, he should look across the field at fellow first-year starter Bruce Gradkowski. Just a few weeks ago, he's engineering come-from-behind, dramatic wins. Now, he's completing 10 passes and getting blown out by 28 in front of the entire nation. Fame is fleeting, Mr. Romo. Before soon, you'll go back to your house of ribs.
Better keep up those wins, Romo. Jessica Simpson's not dating a rib jockey.

Chiefs 19, Broncos 10- And Jake Plummer is finally put out of his misery by "The Punisher", a.k.a. Mike Shanahan. Unfortunately, I missed this game, as ours was one of millions of households who did not have access to the NFL Network. I can only hope that the network will air ads every commercial break urging us to bother our local cable operator and tell them to pay the already-rich NFL even more money.

Vikings 31, Cardinals 26- Did I read these stats right? The Cardinals attempted 51 passes and 6 runs? At 2-9, I guess you could say that angle didn't work either, Denny.

Rams 20, 49ers 17- Antonio Bryant: 2 catches, 53 yards, no speeding tickets for going 100 in his Lamborghini.

Jets 26, Texans 11- The leading rushers in this one: Wali Lundy with 11 yards for Houston, and Leon "Middle Finger" Washington with 17 for the Jets. Who were the offensive coordinators, Dennis Green and Dennis Green?
Those aren't middle fingers. He's just predicting Wali Lundy's 11 yards on Sunday.

Bills 27, Jaguars 24- Remember when the Steelers played Jacksonville on Monday Night Football? And all that talk about how the national media doesn't respect the Jaguars? Seems like eons ago. Oh well, at least Matt Jones scored a touchdown for Tony Kornheiser's fantasy team.

Bengals 30, Browns 0- Continuing my theme of teams who can't run the ball, Cleveland was led by Jerome Harrison with 18 yards. Meanwhile, Charlie Frye is becoming the Browns QB we all hoped he would become, with 4 interceptions and 1 jersey-grabbing altercation courtesy of Braylon Edwards.

Chargers 21, Raiders 14- Before we induct Phil Rivers into the 2006 NFL Hall of Fame class alongside Tony Romo and Rex Grossman (but only the Rex Grossman from weeks 1-5), note Rivers' 133 yard/0 TD/1 INT performance against the 2-9 Raiders. But once again, the Chargers are bailed out by Ladainian Tomlinson, who ran for two touchdowns, threw for their third, blanketed Randy Moss all day, and delivered a baby panda at the San Diego Zoo.

Patriots 17, Bears 13- The Bears just killed fantasy players in this one. Rex Grossman throws not one, not two, but three interceptions. And Thomas Jones finishes with the dreaded 99 yards rushing.

Giants 21, Titans 0- What's that? The Giants lost???? 24-21? They were winning 21-0 with 10 minutes to go! What's that? They allowed 24 points in the 4th quarter? Vince Young accounted for all of the touchdowns? The same Vince Young who missed the game flight last week? And Eli Manning threw a back-breaking interception with 44 seconds to go? The same Eli Manning who "grew up" in week two? The same Eli Manning who has the worst passer rating of any QB since 2004? OK, you got me. What are you going to tell me next...the defending Super Bowl champs are 4-7 and have been shut out twice?

Colts 45, Eagles 21- Well, Philly's lost 5 of 6 and Donovan McNabb, so we can officially write off a second consecutive season. And how about those Colts? Look at Sunday's stats: Joseph Addai, Edgerrin James' replacement, runs for 171 yards and 4 TDs. The man he replaced had 4 carries for 15 yards. I can emphatically say that this is definitely the year for the Colts. Not like in 2005, or 2004, or 2003, or even 2002. This team is different. It's special.