TODAY'S HEADLINES

The Duquesne Dukes played their last home baseball game ever on Sunday, an 8-3 loss to Temple. 

The school announced in January that it was dropping the program due to financial reasons.  Duquesne has had a baseball team since 1888 and has seen the likes of "The Chief", Art Rooney, and former big-leaguers Joe Beimel and brothers Dick and Dave Ricketts wear the Dukes uniform. Their season concludes with a weekend series at  Fordham. [PG]

Rob Rossi, the man who once said the Penguins should trade Sidney Crosby, is now banging the drum for the team to deal Evgeni Malkin. But blowing up the nucleus of this team in some form or another seems to be everyone's answer to the Pens' early exit, so I can't say he's the only one making this argument. [Trib]

Charlie Morton (1-6, 9.19) and Kyle Kendrick (1-1, 5.89) take the mound tonight in Philly as the Pirates take on the defending NL Champs.

The 23-13 Phillies have won 11 of their last 14 and could active Jimmy Rollins from the DL prior to the game. Philadelphia swept Milwaukee in a three-game series over the weekend. [PittsburghPirates.com]

Ron Burkle, secretive money man behind the Pittsburgh Penguins was profiled in depth by the PG on Sunday despite his not agreeing to be interviewed for the article - further proving their point that he's a pretty under-the radar guy for a billionaire. [PG]

Ray Shero has been hearing his share of criticism in the wake of the Pens' disappointing conclusion to their season, and here's a brief history of his moves while at the helm. [KDKA]

Dancing with the Celebrities of Pittsburgh happened this weekend, and if you ever wanted to watch Peggy Finnegan do the foxtrot, Channel 11's website has just the gallery for you. [WPXI]

Email your feedback, questions, and tips Mondesishouse@gmail.com

 

TWO OUTTA THREE AIN'T BAD

SI.com just released their five best/five worst owner lists for each sport (MLB, NFL, NHL, NBA), and you shouldn't be shocked to learn that Pittsburgh placed two ownership groups on the "best" list: Mario Lemieux & Ron Burkle (#3 in the NHL) and the Rooney family, #1 in the NFL. Mark Cuban, a Pittsburgh native and president of the Kenyon Martin Fan Club (WOW - has that gotten ugly), landed at #3 on the NBA list.

Under the guidance of their respective owners, the Penguins' value has increased from $95 million to $195 million, and the Steelers has shot from $2,500 to just over $1 billion. Both teams negotiated new stadium/arena deals, and both have been to their finals in the past year. Throw in their fanatical followings and solid futures and that's the recipe for good ownership.

In case you haven't yet noticed, the Pirates did not make the "best" list, but in a refreshing change, they didn't make the "worst" list either. The MLB award went to Baltimore's Peter Angelos, who's overseen quite a train wreck since taking over in 1993. Of course, they do have Matt Wieters to look forward to. But I digress. I'm too focused on hockey to pick on the Pirates today.

Top 5/Bottom 5 MLB [SI.com]
Top 5/Bottom 5 NFL [SI.com]
Top 5/Bottom 5 NBA [SI.com]
Top 5/Bottom 5 MLB [SI.com]

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NEWS AND NOTES

--Two shots in the first period and Sidney Crosby is hurt. So go the Pittsburgh Penguins last night in a 4-1 loss to Wayne Gretzky, Ulf Samuelsson, and the Phoenix Coyotes... [PG]

...which results in trade rumors a-plenty to keep the fans busy. [Lets Go Pens]

--Pens are the 18th-most valuable team in the NHL, according to Forbes magazine. That's up $88 million since it was taken over by Mario Lemieux and Ron Burkle in 1999. [Forbes.com]

--Joey Porter is leading the NFL in sacks and is poised to break Michael Strahan's single-season record. Seriously. [Trib]

--Guy climbs on top of street sign after Phillies win the World Series, fans throw vodka bottles at him and cheer when he falls. Of course, there's video. [Kiss 96.1]

--America's favorite hockey mom comes to Latrobe. She got a warmer greeting than, say, the greeting she got in Philly. [Trib]

--But don't fear...she was soon getting booed again for mentioning the Phillies win at an Erie stop, a mere 420 miles away from Philadelphia. [The Sporting Blog]

--There's a new episode of the WDVE Morning Show's Gunslingers available, as Sheriff Tomlin talks with the boys about Washington, and Mike Singletary makes a guest appearance. A+ stuff. [WDVE]

--Add Ryan Clark to the list of Steelers fined this season. I believe that brings their total to roughly $52 million in fines in 2008. [AOL Fanhouse]

--The Monroeville-filmed Zach and Miri Make a Porno hits theaters today. It features our city with images of a drunken Steelers fan, a Penguins Stanley Cup flag, a crummy old car fishtailing on snowy streets, a cameo by Tom Savini and a main setting of Monroeville. It was also banned in Utah. Not one for the kids.

Send your news, tips, and links to Mondesishouse@gmail.com.

NEWS AND NOTES

A few things while I finish up the second half of the Pittsburgh Sports Media Popularity Contest (to be unveiled at some point later today)...

--Reader Steve B. contends that guitarist Paul Gilbert (and not Rocco Mediate) is/was the best thing to ever come out of Greensburg, PA:

Considered one of the world's greatest rock guitarists for years, in the same class as Steve Vai and Joe Satriani. Plus, who else in fairly recent years from Western, PA has been on the Tonight Show and has had a platinum album with a Billbord Hot 100 No. 1 hit. (Mr. Big - To Be With You, 1992)?

Good points...but Gilbert can't take credit for knocking Tiger Woods out for the year.

--Cecil from Cecil thought we would like the worst album covers of all time.

--SOB (his real initials) sends over a Vanity Fair article on Bill Clinton that features a mention of Penguins owner Ron Burkle and his attractive, blonde, "not much older than 19 if she was that" guest.

--Our friends at Pierogis N'at came up with a new top 1o list: Top 10 Best/Worst Sports Celebrations.

--It appears that Roger Clemens sold his Bentley to Poison singer/Steeler fan Bret Michaels recently. Early word is that he sold the car to get some cash to put against his legal bills. Sorry, but I'm not buying that. According to Baseball Reference, Clemens took home at least $121 million in salary alone during his career, and their numbers only go through 2005 (not counting the ransom he took from Houston in '06 and the Yanks in '07). And that's just his on-field money. I find it hard to believe that Clemens' cash well has dried up to the point that he has to sell a used ride to a friend of Brady Quinn.

Send your interesting links to mondesishouse@gmail.com for these fun little buffers between "real" posts.

The News

Got news? Send it to mondesishouse@gmail.com.

--One of these men just signed a contract worth $102 million. One of these men just gave away $102 million. Yet they're both happy.

Somehow, I still fear that the Steelers will be haunted by the "cheap" label next year only for the fact that we don't chase after other teams' high-ticket free agents as soon as the clock strikes midnight. Feel free to call those people "ignorami".

FYI, the new deal does not specifically prohibit Roethlisberger from riding a motorcycle. It's always good to leave that door open. But I think he's learned his lesson.

By the way, why was Randy Moss' $27 million deal the headline on ESPN and SportsCenter ahead of a deal worth almost four times as much?

--In a nausea-inducing contest at Morgantown, Pitt fell to the WVU Mountaineers, 76-62, on Monday night. It was a lifeless performance from the Panthers, who dropped to 21-9, 9-8 in the process.

There wasn't much to take away from this night for a Pitt fan, other than the fact that Joe Alexander can't score any more points since the game is now over. The junior forward lit up the defense-optional Panthers for 32 points, going 10-16 from the floor.

Levance Fields led Pitt with 15 points while enduring a chorus of "Ta-ser" from WVU fans the entire night. This from a school that hired Bob Huggins. I guess West Virginians don't subscribe to the glass house theory.

Sam Young and DeJuan Blair were in foul trouble for most of the game, as Young fouled out with 7:21 to play. Young finished with 13 and four boards, while Blair added 10 and three in 22 minutes.

The Panthers finish their roller coaster regular season on Sunday versus 10-19 DePaul.

--Ben who? Tom Gorzelanny just got a $33,000 raise! As Plex used to say, "that's long cash".

--If you're a Penguins fan, you have to read this article on Ron Burkle, then try to contain your enthusiasm.

--In NFL free agent news, the Cleveland Browns continued to throw around money in a desperate attempt to become relevant, giving WR Donte Stallworth $35 million/$10 million guaranteed. Considering that this will be Stallworth's fourth stop in the last 27 months, I don't know how amped I'd be for this deal if I were a Cleveland fan. Of course, if I rooted for Cleveland teams, the Donte Stallworth signing would be the least of my problems.

The Browns also added 653 pounds of defensive linemen in the form of Shaun Rogers and Corey Williams, they inked QB Derek Anderson to a three-year deal, and they extended RB/Ex-Con Jamal Lewis for three more seasons as well. Start engraving the Lombardi Trophy tomorrow, right Brownie fans?

To add to the excitement, the Browns were already declared the "Free Agency Winner" by John Clayton, and that's always good. Don't believe me? Then let me take you back to The Professor's 2007 article:

Winners

1. San Francisco 49ers: They are on the right path. After signing cornerback Nate Clements, nose tackle Aubrayo Franklin, linebacker Tully Banta-Cain and safety Michael Lewis, the 49ers are looking more like a 3-4 defense. Franklin will help at nose tackle. Clements matches up against the top receivers on an opposing team. Lewis is a physical safety, and Banta-Cain should improve the team's speed at linebacker. Ashley Lelie will help because he's different from the other San Francisco receivers. He has speed and should be able to help in the red zone. The 49ers aren't done. They still have plenty of money and plenty of draft choices to improve their team.

Well, the 49ers were 5-11. Ashley Lelie's red zone presence added up to 10 catches and no TDs. Tully Banta-Cain had 41 tackles and 3.5 sacks. And with the signings of Clements and Lewis, San Francisco went from a defense that allowed 3,571 passing yards in 2006 to one that allowed 3,643 in 2007. We have a winner!

Clayton had the Patriots at #2, which, in all fairness, was pretty accurate. As for that third "winner"....

3. Miami Dolphins: Talk about attitude. The Dolphins have a 3-4 defense with Jason Taylor, Zach Thomas and Joey Porter. This looks like an AFC Pro Bowl team. Porter was a great signing. Taylor can get the sacks and force fumbles. Porter and Thomas can be the leaders. The other great part of Miami's offseason is that it has acquired three additional draft choices -- in the second, sixth and seventh rounds -- in trades. This franchise traded away too many draft choices over the years and needs to start getting younger. With nine draft choices in hand and good positioning in the draft, the Dolphins are off to a good start.

I won't add any more on the Dolphins blurb, as I would be called out for gratuitous piling on. But if nothing else, this proves that once again, the NFL experts have shown that they know more than us lowly fans. Clayton should just continue to look pretty and tell us about the Steelers' acquisition of T.J. Duckett that's been right around the corner for six years.

Have I excited you yet, Browns fans?

--It's official: Mewelde Moore is a Pittsburgh Steeler. The three-year deal will pay Moore $4.95 million and a $1.35 million signing bonus. Sadly, this signing did not rocket us to the #1 Free Agent Winner.

--The Trib's John Harris says people ignore athletes' good deeds. He cites examples such as Steeler LB Larry Foote, who recently paid for the funeral of a 10-year-old Detroit boy who fell through ice atop a tributary and was pulled out two days later.

--Alexander Ovechkin scored a first-period hat trick and finished with five points in the Capitals' 10-2 win over Boston.

--Robert Irvine, also known as the huge English guy on the Food Network's Dinner Impossible, was let go for apparently embellishing his resume.

--Good news for fans of Family Guy's Cleveland Brown: it looks like he's getting his own spin-off.

--A reader named Eric asked me to post this. And since I do whatever people tell me to do, here it is:

"My buddy and I are looking for table hockey players in the Pittsburgh area to form a stiga league. I participated in a Tournament in Vegas this past January and will be going to Detroit at the end of March. There are some great players across the US in particular Chicago, Detroit and New York. We would love to get something going in Pittsburgh."

If interested, you can reach Eric at eddibacco@landam.com

--Do you know your vintage WWF Action Figures? Then take this quiz. I proudly scored a 12 out of 14.

--How many of you out there have a Grover Body? You know, stick legs, noodle arms, and a gut?

A LIST OF TODAY'S TOP LISTS

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The Awful Truth Behind 5 Items Probably On Your Grocery List

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5 Works of Art That Can Probably Kill You

THE GREATEST CONAN O'BRIEN GUEST MOMENTS

6 Terrible Cameos That Just About Ruined the Movie

6 Music Industry Tricks That Must Die

Worst Case Scenario

Our fears have finally been realized. Today, the Penguins officially declared an impasse with government officials over the stalled arena plan and announced they will agressively explore relocation to a new city.

The Post-Gazette is reporting that this news was delivered to Governor Ed Rendell, Allegheny County Chief Executive Dan Onorato and Pittsburgh Mayor Luke Ravenstahl in a letter today from owners Ron Burkle and Mario Lemieux. According to the article, talks with Kansas City will now become more agressive.

It's the first of potentially many sad days in Pittsburgh. Could you imagine a scenario in which the Penguins win the Stanley Cup and leave town? Because it could happen.