JIM BALSILLIE IS BACK

Jim Balsillie, best known in these parts for uttering "Holy s***" during a live Penguins broadcast in 2006, is back in the news. No, he's not trying to buy the Penguins again. That ship has sailed. This time around, instead of going after Mario Lemieux's team, he's set his eyes on Wayne Gretzky's. The Phoenix Coyotes franchise, which filed for Chapter 11 reorganization this week, is the new target of the man desperately trying to bring NHL hockey to Hamilton, Ontatio, Canada.

Balsillie is 0-for-2 in his NHL team-buying at-bats, first pulling his Pens bid in December of '06. And in 2007, his attempt to buy and move the Nashville Predators also failed, despite his already selling tickets on Ticketmaster for the Hamilton Predators.

It's been written that the scenario of Balsillie being the lone option for Phoenix is Gary Bettman's worst nightmare, based on past failed Balsillie deals as well as the fact that Bettman desperately wants the sport to grow in the United States. So the Commish probably won't like the news that Balsillie already started a website, "Make it Seven", to put pressure on Bettman for a seventh team in Canada. Is it me, or does this dynamic sound like Mark Cuban-David Stern 2.0 in the making if it happens?

Coyotes file for Chapter 11; Balsillie bids to move them to Ontario [Puck Daddy]

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NEWS AND NOTES

--Two shots in the first period and Sidney Crosby is hurt. So go the Pittsburgh Penguins last night in a 4-1 loss to Wayne Gretzky, Ulf Samuelsson, and the Phoenix Coyotes... [PG]

...which results in trade rumors a-plenty to keep the fans busy. [Lets Go Pens]

--Pens are the 18th-most valuable team in the NHL, according to Forbes magazine. That's up $88 million since it was taken over by Mario Lemieux and Ron Burkle in 1999. [Forbes.com]

--Joey Porter is leading the NFL in sacks and is poised to break Michael Strahan's single-season record. Seriously. [Trib]

--Guy climbs on top of street sign after Phillies win the World Series, fans throw vodka bottles at him and cheer when he falls. Of course, there's video. [Kiss 96.1]

--America's favorite hockey mom comes to Latrobe. She got a warmer greeting than, say, the greeting she got in Philly. [Trib]

--But don't fear...she was soon getting booed again for mentioning the Phillies win at an Erie stop, a mere 420 miles away from Philadelphia. [The Sporting Blog]

--There's a new episode of the WDVE Morning Show's Gunslingers available, as Sheriff Tomlin talks with the boys about Washington, and Mike Singletary makes a guest appearance. A+ stuff. [WDVE]

--Add Ryan Clark to the list of Steelers fined this season. I believe that brings their total to roughly $52 million in fines in 2008. [AOL Fanhouse]

--The Monroeville-filmed Zach and Miri Make a Porno hits theaters today. It features our city with images of a drunken Steelers fan, a Penguins Stanley Cup flag, a crummy old car fishtailing on snowy streets, a cameo by Tom Savini and a main setting of Monroeville. It was also banned in Utah. Not one for the kids.

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NEWS AND NOTES

A Jeff Reed picture I actually don't mind looking at

--Yes, I know I didn't get to cover it due to some scheduling issues on Sunday, but Jeff Reed beat the Vikings, 12-10, on Saturday night. The defense looked good, the offensive line looked bad, and Rashard Mendenhall lost two fumbles. Meh. [ESPN.com]

--The Brewers beat the Bucs 4-3 in 12 innings on Sunday, breaking out the brooms in the process. [Trib]

--The Steelers have the least amount of salary cap room remaining in the league. Cynical Steeler fans who always blamed the team's problems on "those cheap Rooneys" must look elsewhere for a complaint. [PSI]

--Here's the longest article you'll ever read on WPIAL coaching salaries. [Trib]

--It's The Wayne Gretzky Sucks Photoshop Expo! That's a cause I can fully support. [The Pensblog]

--Ron Cook says the Steelers can't do without Aaron Smith. [PG]

--Could former Pitt QB Joe Flacco (Tyler Palko's backup) be the starter in Baltimore? Let's hope. [AOL]

--That crazy Swedish wrestler was right. [The Big Lead]

--Spotlight on Johnstown real estate! [Straight Outta Johnstown)

--This year's Dancing with the Stars cast: Kim Kardashian, the poor man's Paris Hilton; professional roaster Jeffrey Ross; former 'N Sync singer Lance Bass; actor Ted McGinley (also known as "Jefferson D'Arcy", Al Bundy's neighbor; celebrity chef Rocco DiSpirito. Gold medalists Misty May-Treanor and Maurice Greene; Hannah Montana star Cody Linley; singer Toni Braxton; All My Children's Susan Lucci; former Wild On host Brooke Burke; and 82-year-old actress Cloris Leachman.

--Big Ben ranks #6 on the NFL QB Douche-o-meter. Is that good or bad? [Gustafun.com]

--Here's the Pitt football season preview as done by the author of Pitt Blather, featuring one of the greatest Wannstache photos ever. [EDSBS]

--Check out this article on the next wave in offense: the A-11, featuring two QBs on the field at once. My favorite line: "He and Humphries have a deal with American Football Monthly magazine to market videotapes ($39.95 each) and an installation manual ($199). "

I'll tell you, if there's one chore that's tough to do without a manual, it's installing an offense.

--Here's video of the taekwondo ref-kick at the Olympics [Kiss 96.1]

--Presenting your 2009 MLB free agents (that the Pirates won't sign). [MLB Trade Rumors]

--Hugging Harold Reynolds points out a Steeler-related grammatical error. [HHR]

--It might take $8 million to lure Michael Strahan out of retirement. [PFT]

--Former Steeler Assistant Ken Whisenhunt named Kurt Warner the Arizona Cardinals' starting QB over Matt Leinart. [Sporting News]

--A Parkersburg-area breeder has surrendered approximately 1,000 dogs to humane society officials. [PG]

--Meet the Obama look-alike. [TMZ]

--9 Reasons It’s Better To Be A College Freshman Now Than It Was In 1998. Luckily, I was a freshman in 1995, when we were introduced to something called "text-based internet service" that ran about as fast as Casey Hampton. [Comedy.com]

--I realize this might be a reach, but are there any art collectors in our audience? My friend Mark Panza, who runs Panza Gallery in Millvale (the best place to get a jersey framed in the city, by the way), is pretty psyched about an exhibit he's hosting that features work from a 91-year-old artist. The PG recently did a story on it, and if you're so inclined, check it out.

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