AFC Contenders as Cookies, Mike & Mike Cartoons, NBA Suspensions, The Yappin Yinzer

NFL:

The Ex-Burgher asks, "Which Christmas Cookie is YOUR AFC Contender?" I'll give you a preview: the Steelers are Baklava.

Former New Orleans Saint and FSU Seminole QB Adrian McPherson sues the Titans. Why? Their mascot ran him over in the preseason. And to answer your question, no, PacMan Jones was not in the mascot suit when the accident happened.

Mondesi regular Cecil from Cecil sends over this Bengals article from ESPN.com. Be sure to check out this part:

"...As if that weren't bad enough, Bengals wideout Chris Henry had been seen vomiting out the side window of Thurman's SUV. Henry, meanwhile, was just two weeks removed from pleading guilty to a gun charge in Florida. In January 2006, while in Orlando, police there say, he stepped from a limo wearing his own black-and-orange Bengals replica jersey and pointed a 9mm Luger into a crowd."

Terrell Owens is fined $35,000 for spitting. So does that mean he has 35,000 less reasons to live?

MLB:
SI.com's John Donovan gives us the major leaguers stealing money. That $50 million Gary Matthews Jr. deal still amazes me.

NBA:

The fines and suspensions are in from the Knicks-Nuggets brawl:

Carmelo, 15 games, as well as a new reputation as a punk

The Knicks, $500,000, which is one week's salary for Larry Brown not to coach them

The Nuggets, $500,000, or a little less in their "Allen Iverson Rainy Day" jar

Mardy Collins, 6 games, and a tryout in the NFL as a safety

Nate Robinson, 10 games, which means he can't alley-oop to himself for a while

Jared Jeffries, 4 games, mostly for being unable to catch Carmelo as he sheepishly backtracked

Nene, 1 game, for thinking he is cool enough to go by one name

Jerome James, 1 game. He won't be able to score his 2.1 points and grab 1 rebound. And all of that output for just $49,090.90 per game! That Isiah, what a GM!

Isiah Thomas, 0 games. How he managed to sneak past the prison guard is beyond me. By all accounts, he instigated it in the first place. I think Isiah thinks he's still a Bad Boy Piston.

MEDIA:
The newest round of ESPN Radio's "Off Mikes" cartoons are now online. Can someone PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE answer me one question...who watches these?

RANDOM FUN STUFF:

Cracked.com counts down the 9 biggest wusses in rock today

Here's something we all need...the Yappin' Yinzer, a talking Pittsburgh doll

Jim Mora, Knicks Nuggets Fight, and TO's Spit

Jim Mora Sr. said Michael Vick is a coach killer. Jim Mora Jr. said he wants to coach the University of Washington. Then he said it was a joke. Then the owner of the Falcons said Jim Mora Jr. made a boneheaded mistake. Yes, the Falcons are truly the model of a stable organization.

The Knicks and Nuggets fought it out on the court, and as usual, the Knicks got destroyed. Then they literally fought, which was more entertaining than the game. Carmelo Anthony, one of the faces of the NBA, scored a quality sucker-punch on Knick Mardy Collins, then backtracked down the court as if he was defending a fast break. This is the post-Detroit brawl-NBA, and even though no New York fans were harmed in the process, look for some healthy fines and suspensions from Godfather Stern. For those of you who've missed it, here is the video of the Knicks and Nuggets fight.

Terrell Owens spit in the face of Falcons CB D'Angelo...I mean...DeAngelo Hall on Saturday night. If it happened on the NFL Network and most of the country missed it, did it really happen?