Big Lead Sports Bar

9/21/2009

THE FUTURE OF THE PIRATES

His name is Rick Ankiel. He has a glove on his head. He used to be a blue-chip pitching prospect, something went terribly wrong, and now he's an outfielder. It sounds like the script of an intriguing Hollywood drama. But the best part? He could be YOUR newest Pittsburgh Pirate.

The PG's Dejan Kovacevic got Never-Nervous Neal Huntington to lift the curtain on the Pirates' offseason plans, and the article sure made it sound like Ankiel and his .233 average will be a natural fit in Pittsburgh next season. Plus, his agent is Scott Boras, which makes this entire story about 1,000 times more interesting. This is one to keep your eye on.

The other cornerstone of the Pirates' extreme offseason makeover appears to be pitcher John Grabow, who they just traded to the Cubs a few months ago. Rick Ankiel, John Grabow...I don't know about you, but I smell the stench of a third championship parade in the near future. Well, maybe that's not a parade, but there's definitely a stench in the air.

Huntington committed to increasing the payroll in 2010, which is significant because everyone and their uncle has been criticizing the Pirates for their budget-slashing 2009 edition. In fact, the cries of cheapness are so loud that Pirate bloggers have taken to defending the Pirates. Say what you want, but this team can still draw 500 on a Monday night in September. Just imagine what they'll pull when Ankiel and Grabow show up.

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8 comments:

JW said...

They tried the hitter-turned-pitcher route with JVB and that failed. Now, let's shoot for the pitcher-turned-hitter!

EnsErmac said...

If the Pirates were smart, they'd sign Tim Wakefield. They could let him pitch every three days and set the record for most games pitched a year. The pitching would be no worse than they already have. Wakefield is a remnant from when the team wasn't terrible and a few fans might still have a soft spot for him.

They won't though. Maybe we can resign Rinku and Dinesh.

Steve said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Steve said...

"If the Pirates were smart..."?

I'm impressed by your ability to continue typing after such brilliant comedy.

BurressWithButterflyWings said...

Where is the guy who told me I didn't know anything about baseball because I ripped Huntington's comment regarding left handed relief specialists being overrated?

Well, now St. Neil is trying to acquire Grabow or someone in his mold for that once extremely overrated position.

Papa Eo said...

I know this may be met with laughs and snide comments, but in all reality, do you think the Bucs have AAANNNNNYYY shot of signing (or any interest in going after) this Cuban defector, Aroldis Chapman? I know Cubans who defect tend to be rolls of the dice, but imagine the message that would send to the fan base if we nabbed one of the "best pitchers in the world" according to the report I heard on SportsCenter.

I know the Yankees are after him, which means nobody else except Boston, Anaheim, or the Mets will probably even come close to signing him, but he'd likely be an upgrade over Ankiel or Grabow, so I just wanted to start a conversation on this topic, even though there probably is not one to be had.

I'm just a 24 year-old who can't remember the Pirates ever being any good.

Steve said...

I'm 41 and can't remember them being any good either. I killed those good brain cells with alcohol years ago dealing with a difficult NLCS loss.

People keep telling me about this baseball player named Sid Bream though...

The Mad Bubbler said...

Please quit talking about the Pirates