Hoffman Saves the Day...for the AL

Well, the 77th MLB All Star Game just concluded moments ago, taking place a mere half hour from Mondesi's House International Headquarters. The NL, nursing a 2-1 lead after eight innings, brought in some closer named Hoffman to shut the door on the pesky AL. No, it wasn't Philip Seymour Hoffman, it was San Diego's Trevor Hoffman, he of 460 career saves, only 18 away from tying Lee Smith for the most all time.

Philip Seymour Hoffman as Capote. Good enough for an Oscar, but snubbed for the Celebrity Softball Game.

Hoffman promptly set down Jermaine Dye and B-12 Tejada, but Paul Konerko singled and kept hope alive. With Jose "Don't Call Me Javy" Lopez running for Konerko, Troy Glaus ground-rule doubled, setting the scene for another dramatic All Star Moment featuring a Texas Ranger. Hank Blalock was taking the night off, but Michael Young stepped up with a two-run triple, and the AL headed to the bottom 9th up by one.

Michael Young makes a new pen pal from Toronto

We move to the bottom of the 9th, and in a surreal scene, it's Mariano Rivera on to close the door at a big game at PNC Park. Nonetheless, I liked the NL's chances, with Freddy Sanchez, Carlos Beltran and Ryan Howard due up. Unfortunately, "Fred Ex" (as in, "He delivers"...apparently a t-shirt being sold in Pittsburgh these days, not a Freddie Mitchell reference) could only muster a groundout. But he certainly held his own against Rivera. Beltran reached on a bobble by Lopez, then moved to second when Willie Stargell Jr. grounded out. It was all up to Carlos Lee, who spared everyone involved the thought of extra innings by popping out to 2nd. AL wins, AL wins. Home field advantage for the 18 White Sox dressed tonight.

Carlos Lee never has to worry about being confused for David Ortiz

The story of the game, at least in the early going, was the heat being offered by the one-time Mr. Alyssa Milano, Brad Penny. Her biography on NNDB lists past boyfriends such as Carl Pavano of the Yankees, Barry Zito of the A's, Limp Bizkit's Fred Durst, N Sync's Justin Timberlake, and Growing Pains' Kirk Cameron. Now that's a real All Star lineup.

"I've got a weakness for millionaire pitchers"

The 2006 All Star Game will also be remembered for the 15 players who didn't get in the game. 2009 Pittsburgh Pirates manager Phil Garner (I'm making my prediction now) actually left some notable players with bench splinters, including Andruw Jones, Nomar Hamm, Dan Uggla, and Scott Rolen. Pitchers left for the 16th inning included Chris Capuano, Jason Schmidt, and Carlos Zambrano. That's good news for Zambrano, who now has a rested arm to use the computer again.

Ozzie Guillen Clemente gave the night off to Robinson Cano, AJ Pierzynski, and Alex Rios. Mark Buerhle, Bobby Jenks, Mark Redman, Francisco Liriano, and Jon Papelbon were allowed to save their arms for the playoff runs. That's especially important for Redman. That becomes Mark Redman All Star Joke #1,927.

And they said Guillen was a homophobe

All in all, I think it was a well-played, well-produced All Star Game. The Pirate reps gave the fans a few reasons to cheer, although EBay looked about as nervous as humanly possible before getting introduced. I'm glad he had the single, but his two whiffs dulled the Bay Buzz quite a bit. Sanchez grounded out twice but had some exceptional plays in the field. I honestly thought he was going to come up with a hit against Rivera in the 9th, but it wasn't meant to be on this evening. Much like many of the games played at PNC Park, it was a one run loss for the team we were rooting for.