Big Lead Sports Bar

4/03/2008

Hot Dog Zanzabar's Message Board Mayhem

Lots of lunacy since we last met. The timely events that are ruling the message board roost these days are the annual college basketball coaching carousel and the start of the MLB season. Thankfully, each sport's respective fan base is equally crazy, providing some grade-A material.

We’ll start off our little field trip in Bloomington, Indiana. Indiana University made news by recently hiring Big East jerk Tom Crean. I used the word “jerk” because profanity is frowned upon on this site for some reason. But I digress. I have yet to hear one person criticize this hire from Indiana’s behalf, so it’s safe to say that they've made their first smart hire since Pitt fan Bobby Knight (more on him later) was run out of town.
Some people are questioning why Crean jumped ship when it is obvious that he has a monumental rebuilding job facing possible probation; I guess the obvious answer is money, which I’m sure Indiana is giving him plenty of. But the answer might be a little more than that. Maybe the opportunity to rub elbows with none other than Jared Fogle, former zeppelin and Subway spokesman, was what did it. Idiotic claims like this are why message board rumors are dismissed so easily. Although, if it comes to pass that Jared Fogle flew Tom Crean from Milwaukee to Bloomington, I’ll eat crow. And a chicken teriyaki on honey wheat.


Since Crean bailed on Marquette, the Golden Whatevers have been feeling a little down. I won’t bore you with the list of possible candidates that their “insiders” have compiled; instead I’ll just report that they are seeing the brighter side of things. Apparently, a trip to the WNIT finals fills the void that a highly successful coach leaving creates.

While Marquette fans are in the regrouping phase, the Western Kentucky fans are reeling right now as victims of a cruel April Fool’s Day joke. The hot rumor was that a lucrative deal was in place for Bob Knight to take over the Hilltoppers. This rumor started by an Indiana fan that obviously needs kicked in the face. Why the heck would someone jerk around Western Kentucky fans?

The final stop on our coaching carousel tour is Stillwater, Oklahoma. I regret to inform you that I won’t be calling out any ridiculous internet posters for outrageous claims. I will only point out the claim that T. Boone Pickens is willing to fork over $4 million per year over 10 years to retain Bill Self. For those of you unaware with Mr. Pickens, let’s just say he is a retired Gordon Gecko that pours tons (hundreds of millions) of money into Oklahoma State. If Phil Jackson were an Oklahoma State candidate, I wouldn’t be surprised with Mr. Pickens in the fold. I just wish this guy had the itch to control a MLB team in western Pennsylvania

Speaking of the Pirates, I found a great site that really pulls no punches when it comes to their thoughts on the Pirates. The site is called Maximum Grilled Pirates, and they love them some Bucco. If you ever have an hour to kill, click on the Maximum Grilled Dictionary, which features some great terms. My personal favorites are “31. Sveuming” which I can only assume is unbuttoning the top four buttons on a shirt and “86. Erroramus Ramirez” which needs no explanation for people that saw him wearing a non-Cub uniform.

Until next time….

3 comments:

Cecil from Cecil Twp. said...

Tom Crean = Tom Arnold

jtp2106 said...

T. Boone Pickens is the reason why i hate big time college athletics. The guy will donate millions of dollars to build a new stadium, but he won't donate to academics at OSU. You know, beating Texas Tech in football is way more important than funding something unimportant things like cancer research or whatever they might be trying to do there.

Meadowbrookalum1 said...

jtp....academics are what endowments are earmarked for. Big time programs (football and basketball) are what fund the entire athletic departments (golf, swimming, soccer, etc) at universitits. This frees the academic community from having to take a single cent out of their operating budget every year, which, in turn, leaves more money for academics scholarships, research, physical plant, student acivities, etc. And please don't think for one moment that the athletic community doesn't give back to the university in ways other than new stadiums. I really think you should reevaluate your stance here.