Big Lead Sports Bar

3/04/2008

Rege Ryan: A Plea to Pirate Fans

As the Pirates venture into the 2008 season, I've been taking time reflecting and putting into perspective what the past 15 seasons as a Pirate fan has felt like. In retrospect, it's actually gone by rather quickly. Nonetheless, it baffles me how I've let myself be used for so long. After last season I had a moment of clarity and decided I'm done with my usual "going through the motions" method of fanhood. I feel I've given too much and not received enough in return. Just like the famous line from Fever Pitch: "Yeah, you love the Bucs, but have they ever loved you back?"

Basically, I feel like the victim in a 15-year abusive relationship. Every year I tell myself I'm through, and like most people in denial, I come back every year to go through the same abuse. Unfortunately, there is no shelter for a Pirates fan to seek refuge. I've come to grips with the fact that I am hopelessly devoted to this team and I plan to go down with the ship. But that doesn't mean I can't at least attempt to temporarily walk away.

I keep hanging on, year-in and year-out, like a pathetic fool. I know it will be just my luck that the year I do abandon ship and denounce the team, they will make the playoffs and torture me more by making me eat my crow. But now more now than ever, I've lost total hope that's there might be an end in sight. This year does look brighter than some in the past, but I still feel we are line for the same results.

In all reality, the Pirates are like crystal meth: they are a horrible life altering addiction, minus the loss of teeth and yellow skin. As much as we resist them, we come back and blow our money like strung out junkies on this team. I've realized now that we are not Pirate fans, but Pirate customers. The dealers/management know we are pathetically hooked on sub .500 baseball and bobble heads, and they will exploit this addiction as long as they can.

To me, paying for Pirate tickets is like paying for a bad lapdance from an ugly stripper. She's ugly, smelly and slightly overweight, but just because the friends you came with (Red Sox, Yankee, Cards fans) have all the attractive strippers occupied doesn't mean that you need to throw your money away on the skankiest looking stripper there. Just take a time out, gather yourself, and wait your turn. Keep your money in your pocket and spend it on something quality down the road-like Pens tickets.

So I ask this of all battered and abused Pirate fans out there. Walk away from this abuse marriage with the Bucs and take back your fan-hood. You can still root for the Bucs, but don't give your money away to the ugly stripper. You deserve better.

2 comments:

Cecil from Cecil Twp. said...

Think of the place the Buccos held in your life in 1992 in relation to the place they hold today.

1992: Definitely even with the Pens and only a notch behind the Steelers.

Today: No better than a passing interest.

The 1997 season was the last time I went out of my way to watch a Bucco game on TV.

I do that for Monday Night Football every week. Even if its Bengals-Ravens.

Koz said...

Last season was the first year I didn't attend a Pirates game in person, maybe for the first time ever in my 26 year life.

I plan on continuing my boycott this season as well. The team is absolutely abhorrent and done everything possible to drive me away as a fan. I used to support them even when they lost because I thought they tried, but last season, I questioned that too. Certainly some players are putting forth a good effort, but just as Rege states here, I can't in good conscience financially support this organization any longer.