Big Lead Sports Bar

6/21/2007

Unreal

An actual email I received on Wednesday afternoon at 11:14 AM:

From "A. J." Jun 20 (13 hours ago)
to Mondesi's House

date Jun 20, 2007 11:14 AM

subject:
two things...

mailed-by
gmail.com


Tonight the Buccos face Jeff Weaver (0-6 with a 10.97 ERA). How much you wanna bet that they somehow make him look like the second coming of Cy Young?
I don't know, AJ...how does Weaver's line from Wednesday's Pirates at Mariners game look to you?
Weaver, SEA
9 IP, 4 Hits, 0 ER, 2 BB, 5 K, and a shutout.
To me, it looks like the second coming of Cy Young. Not only did a pitcher with a 10.97 ERA shutout the Pirates, he only allowed six baserunners in the process.
WE WILL
rehabilitate the careers of Jeff Weaver and Kameron Loe.
My second topic from this game is reprinting the email from "Chris in Seattle" from yesterday's mailbag:
I live in Seattle and thought I might bring you up to speed on a couple of things. First, Richie Sexson is terrible, especially for what he's being paid (15.5 mil this year). With a .198 batting average, he's not even up to the Mendoza line. One of the local bars has a special named after him - "Cheap Sexson Mondays" which is probably the most brilliant play on words that I've heard in the last several years, with Bud and Bud Light bottles for whatever his average is as of Sunday night each week. Here's their Citysearch link, in case you want to have some fun with it.
Well, the terrible Richie Sexson hit his second dinger in as many nights against the Pirates, and he's 4-for-8 in the series so far. And thanks to the Pirates, he's now a full nine points above the Mendoza Line. Congratulations to Cheap Sexson for at least realizing and capitalizing on an opportunity to jump-start his moribund season.
To top things off on yet another depressing Pirate evening, the post-game show after this world-class embarrassment led off with the Pirates Parrot Sopranos parody. You know, this thing was cute when it was quasi-underground on a site with the great name of Dorothy Mantooth is a Saint. But now that it's gone "mainstream", with a feature article in the PG, I don't know...maybe the Pirates should cool it just a little. I mean, it's fantastic that they succeeded in creating such a popular viral video, because that's what a Major League baseball team is in business for. But geez, have some self-respect already. Would you ever see the Steelers or Penguins participate in such a charade?
By the way, on a related note...it looks as if the Pirates have a Myspace page. If this is legit, I guarantee that Willie Stargell is rolling over in his grave.
Did the Parrot Get Whacked [Dorothy Mantooth is a Saint]

5 comments:

TheStarterWife said...

Ugh. I'm going to see the Buccos take on the Angels on Saturday and already know I am going to feel like I did when I saw them play the Dodgers just a month ago.

"Why did I spend how much money to see my team loose?"

Can't wait to hear Chris's report from Seattle.

Dirty Sanchez said...

A few more games against the Pirates and those Bud bottles are going to cost around $3.00. Still not a bad price for Cheap Sexson on Monday.

I know Jason Bay will command a fortune when his time comes, but how do you think he would handle being in NY during one of his "I can't see the ball" months when he's hitting .150?

HotDog_Zanzabar said...

I'll reiterate what I said the other day, how many days until Camp Tomlin opens up?

I totally agree with the Pirates being in the wrong for promoting their parody. Shouldn't they be worried about winning games instead of Bobbleheads, undeserving all-stars, and anything else that takes our attention away from the field.

Unknown said...

That's exactly the point, hotdog. They are putting out a crap product on the field, but in order to maintain a positive financial bottom line, they feel they need to present something positive to the public to maintain interest. Using their lapdogs, err I mean TV partners FSN Pittsburgh, they can do that. Again, we are 3-4 weeks from them disappearing into obscurity until late March, and for that I am thankful.

Dirty Sanchez said...

With a decent playoff run by the Penguins, we can push off any concern or caring for the Pirates until next May or June. Unless for some reason you'll care if Jose Hernandez or Nate Mclouth makes the team next spring.