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I would've never believed in my wildest imagination that I'd ever write a post with that title, but this freight-train that left the station today needs some slowing down. And I'm talking about some REAL reasons why the Steelers won't sign the man known as "Ookie", other than the cliched "The Rooneys run a class organization" line. Here's 10 for you:

1. They don't need him.

They have one of the top three QBs in the league, a proven veteran backup who knows the system, and a third-stringer with ample upside that could probably run wildcat formations if they really wanted him to. Besides, they've managed to win two titles since 2006 without Vick. Their roster will be one of the toughest in the league to crack as it already stands. There's just no room.

2. He hasn't played since 2006.

The quarterback position is based on rhythm, reps, familiarity with the offensive scheme and opposing defenses, and comfort level with targets. Vick has none of that, unless he comes in a package deal with Alge Crumpler.

He's rusty, his mind and body are question marks, and in case you've forgotten, his body did age a few years since he's played last. And in a league that virtually discards players at certain positions when they reach certain ages, I'd think that's at least worth a mention.

3. He wasn't that good when he left.

He's never thrown for 3,000 yards in a season and his career completion percentage hasn't even topped 55%. "Yeah, but he ran for 1,000 yards in 2006!" Yes, and his team was 7-9 that year. That's what you have running backs for. Roethlisberger, Brady, and Manning aren't running for 1,000 yards anytime soon, and I don't think anyone has a problem with that.

True, Vick did things that no one else could do on a football field. That makes for great highlight reels and video game doppelgangers, but rarely wins championships. In his prime, he was the football version of Vince Carter earlier in this decade: half-man, half-amazing, always exciting. You never knew what was coming next. Over the past few years, time has not been kind to either athlete. But Carter's whole "telling the opposing defense what play we're running" thing looks like child's play when compared to the electrocution of dogs.

4. He has horrendous judgment

It's not just the dogfighting. It's Ron Mexico. It's flipping the bird to fans. It's the whole marijuana at the airport incident. There's a reason why his Wikipedia page breaks down his legal troubles into dogfighting charges and "Early Incidents". Is this the man you want on your payroll?

I saw a sign on the door at Dollar General the other day that said they drug test potential employees. That's right, you can't do drugs if you want to hold a job at Dollar General. Yet people get on the NFL for their standards and complain about how Michael Vick can't get a job. It's all judgment, my friends. Michael Vick knew the stakes, he ran an illegal dogfighting ring, lied about it to the Commissioner, and proclaimed his innocence throughout most of the early stages. At a position that is basically all judgment, he has proven time and time again that he is incapable of discerning between right and wrong. Is that who you want holding the ball at crunch time?

5. Despite what you've read, PETA will protest.

I highly doubt that a group as big as PETA will totally ignore a huge story like the Michael Vick Comeback Tour (when so many people are watching specifically for their response) in fear of Steeler Nation. Sorry, but I don't think that's an organization easily intimidated by conflict.

6. The Steelers don't sign other teams' problems.

That's a task better suited for Jerry Jones, Al Davis, or Ralph Wilson. And before you point out the legal woes of James Harrison or Santonio Holmes, remember, the Steelers didn't sign them away from another team. They knew those players as people before the incidents, and were able to make a judgment in the aftermath.

7. In case you missed it, the Steelers already have one distraction.

Players are soon going to be nauseated answering questions about how the lawsuit is affecting Big Ben. I highly doubt that on top of that daily headache, they'd like to publicly comment on the psyche of their new ex-con teammate.

8. What's he ever won?

Here's his "NFL awards" from Wikipedia:

NFL awards

Quite a resume. And there was that playoff game at Lambeau where he beat Lord Favre. Did they give him a ring for that?

9. The connections mentioned mean nothing.

He's from Virginia, just like Mike Tomlin! He's being mentored by Tony Dungy, who is close to Tomlin! The proper response should be, "SO WHAT? "

Tony Dungy knows a lot of people in the NFL. Coaches. Players. Executives. And I'm sure there are a bunch of players in the league who hail from Virginia. Unfortunately, where a player grew up doesn't dictate which coach signs him. These circumstances are both inconsequential in the grand scheme of where Vick ultimately lands.

10. He's just not worth the trouble.

Just like Terrell Owens, Pacman Jones, or any number of recent reclamation projects, the cons greatly outweight the pros. Sure, Buffalo's giving Owens a hero's welcome now, but that franchise hasn't been relevant since the days of Jim Kelly and Thurman Thomas. They're desperate. He'll chew up and spit out Trent Edwards just like Tony Romo, Donovan McNabb, and Jeff Garcia. No, there's no pattern there or anything. Owens and Trent Edwards will be different. Keep believing that, Bills Fan. I'll have what you're drinking.

Guys like Owens, Jones, and Vick have one thing in common: they've never won squat. Just like fellow malcontents Chad Ochocinco and Randy Moss, they've got as many Super Bowl rings as you or I. Yet many an NFL coach believes that he is the missing link between Troubled Player X and unlocking his true potential. That's why Michael Vick will find a job soon enough. Luckily, Mike Tomlin's smart enough to not let his ego or track record get in the way of his intelligence. And that's the biggest reason why Michael Vick will never be a Pittsburgh Steeler.

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AJ said...

#11 - That Cowher guy doesn't coach here anymore.

Steve said...

I actually heard Pittsburgh born Jay Mariotti say the Steelers should sign him because fans are so euphoric and high over the Super Bowl and Stanley Cup Championships that it would be easy for the Steelers to sign him and smooth over the disgruntled objectionable fans. He also thinks the Patriots would be a good fit for Vick because of the Moss example.

I guess losing your friggin mind is what happens to yinzers who go to Ohio State and then move to Chicago.

Steve Braband said...

Anyone who knows anything about the Pittsburgh Steelers organization knows this will never happen. End of story.

Dallas Mike said...

For the record, Vick has 2 playoff wins. In addition to the Green Bay victory in 2002, Atlanta beat St. Louis in 2004 and lost to Philadelphia in the NFC championship.

mondesishouse said...

Right on, Dallas Mike. Made the change. Career playoff record is 2-2.

Unknown said...

top three reasons to sign mike vick:

1) He is the fastest person ever in pads

2) He has a cannon for an arm

3) You get his speed and arm at very much below the market value

i think this is a once in a lifetime opportunity to sign a great player for very little money

yet, i know the Steelers will not sign him, because that is just not what they do

JeremyT said...

He wouldn't even be the fastest guy on the Steeler team. See, there is this guy named Ivan "Ike" Taylor, who recently ran a 4.26 forty time.

John Kang said...

I'm not for signing Vick, but man, he sure did some amazing stuff against us in 2002 and 2006. My jaw was on the ground for those games.

Jason said...

florio owned!

Jeff_King_Fan said...

Corey - "i think this is a once in a lifetime opportunity to sign a great player for very little money" Michael Vick is a great player? take away a long run against minnesota & a playoff victory against GB what has he really accomplished? oh ESPY.

JKANG- True Vick did do some amazing things against us in 2002 & 2006, but Kelly Holcolmb threw for nearly 500 yards vs the steelers & I think David Carr has a big victory over the black & gold, but i dont want either of them.

Blaster said...

Jacksonville should pick him up, then they would fill up their stadium and perhaps stay televised.

BurressWithButterflywings said...

@ Jeff King:

Snell and Wilson to Seattle, Snell will fit in well in Seattle where he can join the masses still whining about what Pittsburgh did to them!

Unknown said...

a person's 40 time does not necessarily translate to on the field speed and quickness....

Anonymous said...

1) He is the fastest person ever in pads-maybe in the prison yard, but probably not even there.

2) He has a cannon for an arm-Ben has a cannon for an arm and two superbowl rings...besides we already have a #7

3) You get his speed and arm at very much below the market value-we already have faster players at below market value.

Jeff_King_Fan said...

4) he kills dogs...we already beat the browns twice a year

Louis Lipps Sinks Ships said...


The credit Vick receives for that 2006 game still bugs me. Yes, he had 4 TD passes, but they were all on short fields (Santonio muffed a punt on the 22, Ben fumbled on the 25, onside kick recovered on the 49). He also benefitted from a FWP fumble on the 26 and a kickoff return to the 28.

All told, Vick was outgained by Ben (238 to 232), even though Ben was knocked out in the 3rd. Charlie Batch only played 1.5 quarters and still nearly outgained Vick (195 yards). QB ratings that day: Vick 96.1, Ben 147.3, Batch 145.0.

Nonetheless, Sean Salisbury goes on to declare that night: "Mark my words, Michael Vick will be the first NFL QB to run for 1,000 yards and throw for 4,000 yards in the same season." Yeah, good luck with that.

/end rant

Unknown said...

If he isn't another candidate for the BFL (Banned For Life) Award, I'm joining PETA!

DJA123 said...

Yeah, yeah, paid his dues.... everyone deserves a second chance... blah, blah blah. He's a punk with athletic talent, but still just a punk. He has the world to play with and he blows it again and again. Give his spot to someone who appreciates the gift. Plus, he tortured and killed dogs for fun. Go away punk.

JeremyT said...

@ Cory. You never mentioned anything about quickness or football speed in your first post. Just "fast." If you remember 1995-1997, Kordell Stewart did the same things as Vick (on the field). Not saying Vick isn't a special athlete, just that he is not quite as special as many think. There have been others before him to have ALL of his game, and there will be others after him to have ALL of his game. Randall Cunningham in his prime was another example. Both Cunningham and Stewart were better QB's than Vick.

Jane said...

"Louis Lipps Sinks Ships" is the best account name in the history of the universe

Unknown said...

First and for most, I've been a member of Steeler Nation since 1970. I'm not the biggest Vick fan but to be honest, he is an extremely talented individual. Even a layoff wouldn't drop him below some of the top talent in the game now. Timing and reps come with practice and i'm sure he wasn't just sitting there in jail reading. People are talking like Vick is a bad person and put him in the T.O. and Pac-man Jones category...Vick was found guilty for his role in dogfighting. He's a country boy that did country things..and it just so happen that that that act was illegal. James Harrison's pitbull dog attacked his son, did people fault Harrison for his dog's aggression?... pitbulls are aggressive by nature, they were bred that way, doesn't make fighting them right, but they are a fighting bred and Vick participated in a sport that is as old as the Roman Empire. Vick is not a trouble maker, you never heard of Vick destroying a team from the inside or being a problem child in college and all his adult life, even though he came from a public housing, low income surroundings. Vick wants to be a winner by any means necessary, whether rushing for a 1,000 yards or attempting to pass it to an open receiver, he did what he could do while the organization tried to find him help... Like when Jordan was the entire team. If any organization can take this situation and make it work it would be the Steelers, if they vouch for you, people will listen cause they have a history of knowing what they are doing. Last comment... he would be needed as a strong backup QB, Batch is on the last leg, Dixon hasn't proven anything as of yet, great potential, but that's it. When Big Ben goes down the team struggles with the flaws in the o-line you need a scrambling QB, a natural scrambling QB which Ben is not...but guess who is? See the picture?