The News

A recap of your favorite links, named in honor of Mike Tomlin
"I'm not telling a story. I'm reporting the news."

--How do you spell "MVP"?

S-I-D-N-E-Y C-R-O-S-B-Y

Mario's going to have to install a new trophy case

--The always-dangerous Nick Dougherty leads after one round at Oakmont. Tiger Woods shot a one-over 71 and was not involved in any Mayoral controversies.

Tiger Woods tees off at the first hole. Not shown: Luke Ravenstahl, lurking in the gallery.

--First, the Pirates bench Jack Wilson. Then, they bring up John Van Benschoten. Is it just me, or does that look like two logical moves in a row? Maybe, but it didn't help on Thursday night, as they were shut out by the Texas Rangers and Kameron Loe, he of the 1-6 record, 7.40 ERA and .314 opponents' batting average.

--How should Daunte Culpepper boost his trade value? I don't know...how about not get in a car accident?

--The New York Islanders are creating a seperate press box-type area for bloggers. I'm going to go out on a limb and say the Pirates probably won't go this route.

--The San Antonio Spurs won the NBA championship last night, finishing off the Cleveland Cavaliers in a four-game sweep. And since this is a Pittsburgh-based blog, I'll understand if you leave my site right now for the mere mention of NBA basketball.

--If I mentioned the letters "NBA" and you're still here, I give you an Aaron Gray sighting: he's currently projected for the 37th pick, by the Portland Trail Blazers. Nothing like getting drafted as a center on the same team as Greg Oden to kick-start a career.

--50 Cent just got paid, so I'm guessing he'll have to change his name to $100 Million.

--How much is Wal-Mart projecting to lose from theft this year? If you guessed $3 billion, you win today's prize of getting to see an old man dressed only in a Wal-Mart bag.

--We close the morning with Cracked.com responding to a Bill Simmons column and coming up with a list of 13 Movie Plots Rendered Completely Ridiculous by Their Stars’ Behavior